Not Never But Just Not Yet

 What a powerful word to shift our hope and perspective. Rather than giving up, throwing in the towel, walking away……..set your eyes to it is still possible. Yet means there is the possibility so don’t shut the door. I have never considered the power of this word for my attitude. Stephen Furtick spoke of it in a podcast that I listened to this morning. There are those words that change when we see them through different eyes. 

Yet~continue believing

Enough~you are

Scatter~pour over others

And several others that we could add to this list. Often people will get them tattooed on their wrist to remind themselves of the power of a word. This word of hope gives us grace for what we have yet to accomplish, yet to control, yet to fix in our lives. 

Most of you know that God put it on my heart to start a podcast almost two years ago. Then long covid took over my life and my lungs. It has made me beat myself up that the podcast has yet to be launched. I feel like I have not kept my promise to put this out into the world. But this morning I had grace for myself with this simple three letter word. That the podcast is not recorded does not mean there has not been movement toward releasing it. I have written the dialogue for the first few as well as prayed continuously  for direction. I am believing there will be a podcast to share my story and hopefully that of others. It just hasn’t happened yet. Stepping Out With Jesus is God’s given name for this platform and that is secured. Step one accomplished in 2023. Now to pray that 2025 may be the year that someone can find it out in the world not just in my head and my heart. 

What are you supposed to keep believing in? That hasn’t been accomplished or healed yet. Reconnecting with a family member. Finally, putting away the bad habit that has haunted you for too long? Or being intentional about being in His Word on a regular basis. Give yourself the hope that you don’t need to give up but realize that it just hasn’t happened yet. Of course, it is up to us to get off our butts and make things happen most of the time. So I will need to plug the microphone that I purchased into my computer and figure it out. And you need to take the first step or next step to getting where you want or need to go. But praying for timing and direction is doing something toward your goal. Believe in yourself rather than beating yourself up for not being further along in the process. Let love and kindness be the motivation in all you do. 1 Corinthians 16:14 is not just how we are to treat others but also how we need to treat ourselves. In the meantime, I will let you know when you can toon into my podcast until then pray for me and I will continue praying for each of you and your journeys. 

In Him,

Joyful

3-25-25

Together~Separately at Times Works for Us

 Two hearts, one love, a lifetime of experiences shared. Yesterday, a couple of different people commented on my life with Ronnie B. First, my daughter called in tears remembering the treasured trips we took as a family and wondering if those adventures are all in the path. Then a friend commented on how Ron and I love spending our time together while also allowing for time to do our own thing. At this stage of my life, as my last birthday in my sixties is only a week away, I am grateful for all the memories of our life together and those that we came together to share when we arrived under one roof. 

Natalie was having a sad moment recalling all the trips of her childhood and recognizing there won’t be anymore with her grandparents or our Ryan. But I told her honestly that her best memories are yet to happen. Although, I have wonderful childhood camping trips that come to mind, the ones I treasure most are the ones with my own kiddos. Natalie is just beginning her life as a mom with two curious boys that will take her on journeys she can’t even imagine. Will they be the same beach scenes she remembers when she was a little girl? Probably not. But they will be the writing of her families story and will give her joy as she closes her eyes and pictures her littles exploring their world. 

Ronnie B and I will be married forty-eight years this June. We were high school sweethearts and I can still smile when I think of the beginning of our love story. Prom pictures show the connection we shared even then. But along with living our lives side by side we have weathered storms that could have split us up but didn’t. The loss of a brother, the loss of a son, the heartbreak of infertility, the joy and pain of adoption, and the separation that lasted way too long because of stubborn hearts were just a few of the hurdles on our path. When Ron lost his brother in a military plane crash, all I wanted to do was comfort him. What he needed was time alone to process. That was a turning point for me. I recognized what he needed was more important than what I had to give. This moment shifted my need to be joined at the hip with my Ronnie B. It didn’t shift my love just my perspective. 

Through the years we have become more independent of one another in a good way. He enjoys his archeology adventures and I am free to spend much needed time with friends and family. Our months long rv trips give us the together time we crave and enjoy. But listening to Ron share his adventures when he comes home from a trip connects us even as we have ventured off separately. I love that we have this balance that works so well for our love and relationship. 

We even have a good balance of time spent with our kids and their families and time spent on other journeys. It has become almost a yearly thing to go with the Guthries on their catamaran to island hop in the Bahamas. What a relaxed and enjoyable time together those couple of weeks are for us. I get in all the swimming in the most heavenly waters and Ronnie B gets plenty of hammock time when we dock. Even in these trips that has so much us time there is always time to do what we love individually. 

I am glad that Natalie and Julie shared their thoughts with me yesterday. My hope is that Natalie looks to the future as well as the past to plan explorations with her own kids. Decades from now she will look back and realize that her childhood adventures were just a first chapter on her story. The ones she and Nate take with their family will be the ones that make her smile the brightest when these years have passed. 

Overall, I look back on my life with joy. Were there difficult days, weeks and even years? Absolutely. But even those have brought me to where I am today. And here is right where I want to be in life. For that I am thankful. 

In Him,

Joyful

3-24-25

The First Day of Spring, Laura Bird Began to Sing

 I am so thankful that we live where we get to look forward to all four seasons. Falling snow is wonderful as I  sitby the fire sipping coffee or sip wine in the hot tub is magical. But I always look forward to spring as the trees begin to bud and the crocus press their little blue heads out of the soil. Just when the wind has gotten tiresome it is time for summer and the heat it brings. My Mom’s birthday was the solstice, the longest day of the year. She loved that her birthday was special in that way. Swimming, barbecues, and camping trips make this such a special time of the year. It was my favorite when my kids were little since school was out and our schedule was more relaxed. Then came the crisp air of fall just as the heat was getting too much to handle. Thankfully, I live where there are dramatic monsoon rains to cool down the afternoons. But the fall brings its own beauty as I drag out the sweaters from the top of the closet and brace for the chill in the air. Some look forward to the pumpkin spice but that is not why I look forward to the autumn. The only draw back is the days continue getting shorter and I crave sunlight. But Christmas shopping begins or at least the lists of what others would enjoy. That makes the shorter days more tolerable. 

This spring I am at home and not on the road in our Chinook rv. I am excited about being at home. I went and purchased a bunch of plants and am excited to spruce up the plants in the house. It will be at least another month before I can put any outside plants in the ground. We get hail storms in the summer, so I gave up on a vegetable garden years ago. But putting in pretty potted plants that I will transfer to the ground around our yard makes me happy. Ronnie B has been planting aspens over on our side yard. I can’t wait until they are a bit bigger and quake in the fall breeze.

The first day of spring always reminds me of my Grandpa Peabody. His mother was born on the equinox and he always said………The first day of spring Laura Bird began to sing. I am grateful for the memories each season brings to mind. Here is to a new season of life and the new life that is evident all around us. 

In Him,

Joyful

3-23-25

Scream First then Coffee and a Slice of Pie

Maybe today is not the day we meet at our usual restaurant to sit politely and speak in low voices. Maybe today is a more shout it from the rooftops and get everything off our hearts kindof meet up. Sometimes we just need to get primal and release all the build up of life into the woods or our pillow. My suggestion is get outside and take a friend you know loves you even when you are releasing a guttural scream. 

Life can pull us in so many directions and even leave us feeling that it doesn’t really matter what we are accomplishing off our to do list. That is when we need to belt out sounds from our guts and then consider………who made this to do list anyway? Is our frustration and disappointment in not getting everything checked off because we just need to work harder? Or perhaps we have come up with a list that is not even possible to complete. More than likely things on our list are not even necessary. Who says the sheets need to be changed every week? Who decided kiddos needed to be in activities that fill every moment of everyday? Who says you are not a good friend if you would rather stomp your feet with a friend than sit calmly over a cup of coffee and pie? Consider that it is us who puts all the stress on ourselves. 

There will be time for coffee with your friend. But right now, throw a fit and get it out of your system. Then take a deep breath and sit down with an eraser to edit your list. What can you take off your plate that you put on that didn’t need to be there. This is the time for prayerfully considering what God has in mind for you and your time. Breathe. And be sure to order the pie. Screaming at the top of your lungs uses a lot of calories. For sure you need to replenish. 

In Him,

Joyful

3-22-25
 

Routines Matter even on the Hardest Days

What do I do when there is a struggle in my life? Do what you would do if there wasn’t. Joyce Meyer gave this advice on Talk it Out this morning. Hmmmm. So when I am facing a hard thing, I just need to do the routine? Yep, that is her point. In a way that makes sense. We condemn pity parties and wallowing in situations for a reason. This points back to the lesson of OTHERS that I have shared a million times. It is worth sharing once more….

Years ago I drove for the HELP program. A program that pairs mostly seniors with those who need a ride to a medical appointment. I had the honor to drive a woman who had terminal cancer to her treatment in Santa Fe about an hour away. In her modest apartment with only two doors she had the word OTHERS on a piece of a brown paper bag. She shared that when she was a youngster, her grandpa had carved this word out of beautiful wood. It was a reminder to always put others first especially when life was hard. Looking inward didn’t get you through the situation quicker but made the time in it more miserable. Looking outward to help others even through your sorrow helped give you perspective on your circumstances and kept you from engulfing yourself in it. 

Here she was facing the end of her life with little money, no family close by, and still doing what she could for others. She was too weak to volunteer other than to make phone calls to encourage others to give their time and funds to benefit others. What a lesson on just what Joyce was speaking of this morning. 

Rather than sitting with a box of tissues weeping on the couch, I choose to get dressed, brush my teeth and step out for my morning walk. Rather than sniveling on social media to bring others into my drama, I choose to Bible study and write. Rather than stomping my feet or ignoring the hardship, I choose to roll up my sleeves and see how I can make the best of the way things play out. Waiting is necessary at times. But how we wait and what we do in the wait is important. Life gives us trouble. God promises that in His word. But He also promises to be with us in the difficulties. He promises to use all things for good. 

Losing my son to suicide made it impossible to breathe. But the testimony of how Christ walked beside me through that lose has become a book that I boldly share with others. My purse is a bit heavier with my book tucked inside. But God gives me the opportunity to hand it to others like the cashier who smiles and lifts those who come through her line all day long. The person who notices that I can use a hand with my packages at the post office and steps up to help gets a book. I am encouraged to sign the book with a note about how their heart and actions impacted me and surely impact others they encounter. What a gift I have through the loss of my son. A Mother’s Journey Through the Loss of Her Son is my faith walk through the hardest ten years of my life. But oh how God clung to me and changed me during that decade. 

No pity party here. I have to remind myself to not wallow even in the small hurts of life. Wailing over not being included or having someone misunderstand my words is not the best practice either. So thank you Joyce for reminding me that when life is difficult I need to just do what I do when life is good. There is beauty at the end of a tunnel and a rainbow after a rain. How I spend my time in the storm matters. It doesn’t part the clouds but it puts sunshine in my attitude. 

In Him,

Joyful

3-18-25

A Time to be Humble and a Time to Roar

 

There are times for being humble and there are times for shouting our praises. The gifts God has blessed us with should be embraced not hidden. I heard it said that light always wins. That is so true. Darkness can only remain until light is introduced. Jesus is our light and we should not hide it but let it shine on others in the most illuminating ways. The song we learned in Sunday school of this little light of mine is true. 

Over the past decades I have moved from avoiding talk of Jesus at all cost due to a relative that pounds people with Him rather than encouraging them to know Him. This movement toward a boldness in faith has happened out of my need that my story may help one more person to be enfolded in Christ’s arms is my life’s work. To know Him and to make Him known is my life’s mission. How could I not want others to experience the love and kindness that I get to live in?

 Stepping out with Jesus is not just to gain heaven. It is to never be alone here and now. It is to know that He is not waiting for us to clean up to come to Him but wants us covered in our messes so He can hold us in His arms. Jesus is the one who adopted me and says it is okay if I fall short or are not enough. The goal is not to be enough but to be loved just as I am. 

Can I tell you that when I opened my laptop and chose this quote, I thought I was writing a totally different blog. But this is where my heart goes when I let God lead my words and thoughts. So you aren’t reading about the anti Israel protestors who know nothing of being humble but believe that the louder they shout the more they will be heard. Instead, my post is about the one who loves us always and will lean in no matter how misguided our steps. Christ’s gentle hands not only embrace me but guide me in ways I often don’t even recognize. But this happens most when I stay connected to Him and spend time in His word and His presence. 

Most of you know that my morning practice is to get up early, sip hot, black coffee, and do a Bible study. Following that up with a writing that allows me to share my heart, my worries, my triumphs and my faith. I don’t boldly give my book away to shine a light on me. But to share the steps I walked after losing my son and how Jesus held me each and every step. It is said that Jesus is not our crutch but our stretcher. I am so glad that He gave me this platform to show how I went from needing Him to carry me on that stretcher to being able to step out with Him hand in hand. He is right there with you just as He is with me. That is why I want you to be enveloped in His love and acceptance. We don’t earn His love and salvation. It is freely given and with that is the comfort that we KNOW we are His and don’t have to wonder if we did enough to earn it. 

In Him,

Joyful

Natalie, the Best of You is Still to Come

 I love that my daughter has always been her own person. She remains close to us while setting out on her own path. Being a city girl is how she identifies even as her parents would never consider that life for ourselves. The hustle and bustle of the city energizes her while the parking can be challenging. This past week she was here at home to take her esthetology state boards. It was great to have her home for a bit. Her dedication to studying and doing her best paid off as she sailed past both tests to her goal. What I admire is not only her commitment but her willingness to see her future her way. 

This road has been a difficult one. She finished her schooling almost two years ago. The challenges that were placed on her path makes it remarkable that she has achieved this goal. She was pregnant, had a truck turn in front of her totally her car and almost taking out her and our unborn grandson. Yet, she continued her studies and made the time to get the medical treatment for wee Auggie. 

I am beyond thrilled to see how God will use this next step in Natalie’s path to touch other people. Not only will they come out of a facial or a waxing with smoother skin but with a closeness that her personality will share. This will benefit both the clinician and the client. Anytime we are connecting with one another is powerfully healing. It is clear that God has a plan for my girl’s future. I am so proud of her and can’t wait to hear the ways she impacts other’s lives. 

In Him,

Joyful

3-11-25