Let Love and Kindness be the Motivation in all We Do……….That is how Dolly Lived!

 Oh what an incredible example for all of us on how to live, how to love and how to walk in faith. When everyone was wearing the WWJD bracelets to remind the what would Jesus do and how to live life, Dolly was walking those steps. Her mission here on earth was to bring joy to each of our lives through her moving songwriting, angelic voice, uplifting performances or her heart for allowing every child to read. Dolly is one of the examples of what Jesus did while he walked among us. The other is Jimmy Carter for his love and kindness through Habitat for Humanity. 

The people that we look up to as not heros but illustration of how to treat others should never fade. There are those who didn’t have the global impact that Dolly had but that just show us in their everyday kindnesses. What a gift it is when we live selflessly. It is not a gift to others as much as to ourselves. I am convinced Dolly would say she gained more than she gave because of her generous, joy filled life.

Her rewards are not only those she receives now in heaven but the moments she connected with others here on earth.She truly did live out 1 Corinthians 16:14 which happens to be my life goal verse. Let love and kindness be the motivation in all you do. When this is our measuring stick, we lean into the fruits of the spirit rather than getting caught up in the worldly gossip, judgement, and exclusion. What each of us does in our daily walk matters to others but in living out this verse we give the greatest gift to ourselves. 

In Him,

Joyful

8-28-26

Compassion is Key, Faith in Heartcrushing Circumstance

That saying of pull yourself up from your bootstraps and get on with it is advice to tackle life on our own. The better advice may be to pause, pray for wisdom to move in the right response to what life is throwing at us. How many times have I rushed in believing I had the right way to handle a situation only to find out that my haste led me to the wrong actions? The older I get the more often I am aware that even when I know I am right about something, I can be wrong. 

This past weekend a family in our town lost their thirteen year old son to a tragic accident. Oh how I grieve for this family and all involved. Even as our hometown comes together to support this family the rumor mill is also sharing facts about what happened that may or may not be correct. I misremembered a street that I lived on for decades. How could my brain have not known the name of this street? But I knew I knew until someone pointed out that I was mistaken. Others are sure they know the circumstances surrounding this loss and sharing it confidently. First, does it matter? A child died. Second, the truth is not always found in the rumors even if you hear it from a reliable source. After all, I shared a fact about a street name that I lived on and I was wrong. Was I a reliable source? Absolutely not. 

What I know is that a family lost their precious son, brother, friend and are grieving. Our part is to give them the space they need to come together and pray for them. Whatever we can do to support others in a time of need is much more important than knowing the details of what happened and why. This hits close to home for me in a couple ways. When Tanner fell off the eighty foot cliff when he was a fifth grader our same community had many stories of what happened and why. Even though I am his mom and stood at the edge of the cliff while a firefighter brought him up on a backboard, I didn’t know what exactly happened. Even as that twelve year old son of mine is close to turning forty this year, I don’t know all the facts about that day. If I pretend to it is for my peace of mind not because I really understand. Bottom line is I don’t need to know but do need to have all the details. Again when we lost Ryan to suicide there were so many stories about the circumstances. People knew that they knew even as we as Ryan’s family can’t possibly understand all that was in his heart at that moment. Having compassion and loving others in difficult times is what our focus should be. 

Faith is the antidote of fear much more than courage. Someone told me once that they could not survive losing a child. I don’t think anyone has the courage to lose a child but our faith gets us through even the moments that are unbearable. I pray for the families involved in this recent loss. I also pray for those who have a need to know the circumstances rather than just embracing those who are hardly able to breathe from the pain. This is not me lecturing others. My first response was to know all the facts and even to share them. That’s how I know I misremembered a street name. This is me reminding myself that faith and courage are what I need to cling to even when my worst fears are realized. No family should lose a child. That is a fact that I know to be true. Please pray for our town and all who are grieving here. 

In Him,

Joyful

8-12-26

 

New Beginnings, Connections, and Prayer

Yesterday was a good day. It was an answered prayer day in many ways. Tanner started a fabulous job and Nate got a job offer which will have him starting in a week or two. New beginning for both of these sons of mine. Thanks to all who pray for them and their families. I could tell Tanner was tired but excited at the end of his first day. God is good!

There is a way back from even the darkest moments. Now to continue to pray for my children to be in relationship with one another. God can do all things and even this. The family trips we took when they were young should be a catalyst to conversations. I know it will come until then I will be patient and pray. 

Lots of new beginnings as school starts and families prepare for getting back into routines. Kayla is off to college while her family adjusts to her being a few hours away. Life moves from season to season. I am no longer stepping to the front of a classroom but can spend some time praying for those who are. What a gift my life with students was to me. The beauty is that many of my littles are still in my life as adults, parents, worker bees. Each of us continues to have a role to play even as opportunities shift and change. There wont be lesson plans or behavior goals for me to write but there are other tasks for me to engage in. I hope to stay connected rather than fading into the background. Whether from coffee dates, social media presence, or quietly praying and reminding others I still care. My job is not finished even though I am retired. God gives each of us opportunities in all phases and stages of life. 

Nate and Tanner are beginning new adventures that will plug them into a work family. The right job is not just about a paycheck but who you interact with during your working hours. I pray for these new opportunities and the relationships they will create. Now I need to go sit at the park and let our Cora dog chase birds. Perhaps a new friend will walk by and chat for a bit. Or better yet, I can take her to the dog park and have a meet up with other dog lovers. I hope you have a wonderful day whether you are on a time clock or at coffee with a friend. 

In Him,

Joyful

8-6-26

 

Hear, Receive, Respond, and Wait the Best Prayer Connections

 

I listened to a Bible teaching this morning on prayer. Megan Fate Marshman had a good prospective that I had not considered. There are four things that happen with our prayers…….God listens, God receives, God responds, and God waits. The first and last can be difficult for us. While God listens and holds onto our prayers, we also listen for Him and need to spend time not only asking but silently being in His presence. As He receives our heart response He allows us time to be still and rest in His comforting presence. Then when we are patient and near to Him the answers will come. Whether they are the ones we wish to receive depends largely on if our requests align with God’s will. The last is the wait. Sometimes prayers are answered immediately but at other times the wait can be years. What we need to know is to have faith that God hears us and wants what is best for us. He uses even the difficult moments to stretch our faith and help us connect with others. There is power in praying alone and with others. 

When Ron and I went through struggles in our marriage, a counselor suggested we separate. We lived in separate homes for years. My prayer and the one I asked others to pray over us was simple. Three words that healed our relationship. Under one roof. Those were hard years. A lot of tears, stress, and being harsh with one another. But the truth is that I cherish that time. It showed us that we belong together. We got back under one roof and a big part of that was beginning a routine of praying together. We would join hands, eyes open and bring the hard conversations to one another with Jesus in the center. It gave us both a safe space to share our hearts that were vulnerable and broken through years of unkindness. I love our life now and wouldn’t change the struggles we went through to get here. 

Prayers are powerful not only in changing our circumstances but mostly in connecting us with the one who is always present in our life. Felix, my six year old grandson, asked me what hell would be like and why we don’t want to go there. My answer is my truth. It is not about fire and brimstone or bashing of teeth. I believe the worst hell is that we are separated from God. His presence and those He places in my life are everything to me. Without Him it is hell. Building the relationship with Him day by day makes it clear just what His presence means in my life. When I don’t make time my life has a bigm gaping hole. 

Let’s all pray for one another not just say we will but share the words with one another right then and  there. God is listening, receiving, responding and waits on us as we wait on Him.

In Him,

Joyful

7-3-26

Aunt Helen Dancing and Rejoicing in Heaven with the Love of her Life

 Sweet, sweet Aunt Helen……..went to be with the love of her life yesterday. She was months away from her hundredth birthday but God called her home into His arms. I love the heart of our aunt. Ronnie B and I raised our boys near her in Northern California. Holidays and family dinners were spent on her and Uncle Raymond’s ranch. My favorite was Easter. Aunt Helen would hide the eggs over and over for the kiddos to find. The kids got tired before she did. She and Mary, my mother-in-love, were such close friends. I am convinced they are up there taking shots of tequila and catching up.

The last time we saw Aunt Helen, Elissa got gender reveal cupcakes for Mayve. Myra, Helen and Donna all took a big bite and were excited to see the pink frosting inside. Myra is Helen’s oldest daughter and she went to heaven after a valiant battle with pancreatic cancer shortly after our cupcakes. This picture is so precious. 

Our family will miss Myra and one of our favorite aunties but we know she is dancing with her man in heaven surrounded by loved ones and will be waiting when Jesus calls us home. I hope there is joyful music up there for all the celebration that is surely occurring today.

In Him,

Joyful

3-10-26

Take that One Step Toward the Light

This is not just a famous quote by a brilliant poet. This is the way we need to approach every obstacle or hard circumstance in our lives. Put one foot in front of the other and take a step. There is light at the end of the tunnel even when the path seems too narrow to navigate through. And the comforting truth is that most of the time we don’t have to travel through the darkness alone. There is always someone that God places along side us to hold our hand, encourage us, and let us be assured that all hope is not lost. 

Does this mean that there won’t be consequences for our actions? No. But even the results are just another hurdle to get over on our way to forgiveness and wholeness. It is easy to believe that everyone has given up on us. That we are too damaged to be loved. But the truth is that God forgives our transgressions and has an agape love that is never taken away. He also puts it in people’s hearts to walk beside even the most vile criminals. Kim is a lawyer friend who steps beside those who have committed horrific capital offenses with compassion and a willingness to do all the work to get the best for her clients. Her heart is for the victim as well as the perpetrator. What a gift God has given her to step beside these fallen people. To know that they are not alone but are heard makes their path less frightening. 

Most of us are stepping into situations that are less dark than Kim’s clients but the fear we carry with us can be just as loud. Just know that you don’t have to walk this path alone. Reach out to who will take your hand and comfort you through the journey. 

But prayerfully consider that your best way out is always through. Even when the darkness seems overwhelming. A sliver of light can give hope and a knowing that the darkness can’t last forever if we walk toward His light. 

In Him,

Joyful

2-4-26

 

Coffee and the Best Love Story

 

Reading my Bible not to get answers but to connect with God. It is not a text book but a love story drawing me nearer to Him. Will I get the direction I need from it? Absolutely. But it is more about building a relationship than anything else. 

Some wonder why I get up around five am to sip coffee and do a Bible study. The truth is that it centers my day. I begin the day with peace and that sets the tone and my perspective. It helps me feel the love of Christ and His ever accepting nature. More than anyone He knows my flaws and embraces me anyway. That is a powerful start to my day. 

It is not just connecting in the morning that sustains me. I need to whisper and check in throughout my day. Just a brief awareness of His presence in my life, in my tasks, in my connections with others. If I intentionally keep Him at the center of my life, I am less likely to fear, get angry, or feel loneliness. 

There is research that confirms the power of spending time in His Word. Apparently, the statistics show that less than four days is not that beneficial. I guess I need to read my Bible more days than I don’t. That is the lesson here. 

My Amplified Bible has been a game changer for me. Before I avoided the old testament and Revelation believing it was not the best of the story. But this Bible points me back to how the old testament foreshadows Christ coming and dying for me. It relates the old and the new and is growing my understanding of both. I am thankful someone pointed out this version that has helped clarify so much for me. It just shows that sometimes it is not continuing to do the same thing but being willing to embrace a new way of looking at the familiar. 

So here I sit with my steaming cup of coffee beside me, the sun just now streaming in the window, and my Bible opened to Romans. It is no doubt going to be a fabulous day with this beginning. 

In Him,

Joyful

2-1-26 

24 Hours May be Unreachable but I am Going to Make it a Goal Anyway

 But does that sound simple. In reality it just may be impossible. I would love to say that I can achieve this goal for at least one day but I am not convinced. That being said, i can strive to achieve less complaining and lean toward more gratitude. 1 Corinthians 16:14 says Do everything in love. That is another tough goal to achieve. I try but fail more often than I care to admit. The failure usually comes in the form of gossip of grumbling to someone else or myself about how others act. Even beating myself up for mistakes I make is not a loving way to live. 

There may never come a day when I lay my head on my pillow and can say I achieved either of these goals. But the aspiring toward these goals will move me from where I am today toward a more peaceful, appreciative existence. I am not ever going to be perfect. That is not what I am called to. But being a better version of myself as I walk my walk through life is my goal. 

Rather than sharing my aches, pains, and disappointments I want to share what is fabulous. Rose colored glasses is a perspective shifting attempt to see the best rather than the worst in others and ourselves. I complain about the news only reporting and sensationalizing our communities but I tend to do the same in how I choose to share. And it is a choice. One that I need to be intentional about shifting my focus from the negative to the positive. It takes looking for the good. I may never get to a whole 24 hours snivel free but I am going to reach for it. Pray for me as I pray for you.

In Him,

Joyful

1-26-26

My Habits Shape My Future. It is Up to Me to Decide What Habits I will Allow in my Life.

 Once again I find myself wishing I had habits in place that didn’t waste my time but connected me more to others. I find myself spending more time on my phone, streaming videos to watch alone rather than sitting at a table with a board game or sharing popcorn and a movie with Ronnie B. Too many times I have deleted games just to download them again in a week or two. A couple years ago, I made a commitment to not take my phone with me into the bathroom. Now I spend too much time on the pot because I am not in that habit any longer. Too much information you say. Well, do you or do you not hang out with your phone even in this smallest room of your house? Be honest! 

What habits do I want to include in my life and my daily routine? There is a saying that what fills our calendar and checkbook is what is our priority. Checkbooks are gone and our calendars are on our phones but the premise is still accurate. If the Amazon delivery guy rings my doorbell more than my neighbor and friend, I might have a habit I am not fond of. 

Here I am at the beginning of the year I turn seventy. You would think I would have control of my spending of my time and money by now. Nope. Oh I have had improvements over the decades. I do get up early and do my Bible study and try to blog most days. I do carry books with me about losing my son to share my story and my faith with others. But I also waste time that I can’t get back on mindless games. I don’t use my phone for its intended purpose enough. Connecting with people is why phones were invented in the first place. 

So today I am once again deleting the humorous games from my phone, making a commitment to call others to set up face to face coffee dates, and trying to leave my phone out of places I don’t need it. Someone said they go on a silent walk everyday. When I think of taking a walk it always includes my phone. Listening to a podcast or writing a to do list is a valid use of my phone. But being silent with my own thoughts is a powerful habit. I used to make my students lay on the floor after lunch with the lights off in silence. After all, I am a human being not a human doing. So I want to take time to simply be with me. Then I will hopefully be more inclined to be with you.  Let me see how this goes this time. I will let you know. 

In Him,

Joyful

1-22-26

A Quiet Whisper and a Gentle Nudge to Trust the Next Step

 Oh the gentle nudge of Jesus presses into my back moving me toward Him. A gentle nudge means a subtle, soft push or reminder to encourage someone to do something, without being forceful, coercive, or demanding. That is how Jesus presses into my back prompting me to engage in an activity or conversation. He is never going to bully or use a sledgehammer to get me to move into His will but will give me reminders of the next step I am supposed to take. Jesus is a gentleman and whispers in my ear rather than shouting to get my attention. 

Throughout my life I have felt Him pressing into my back to do something. Wash teenage girls feet on my kitchen counter was a thing I sat still and argued about before finally listening. It was one of the most powerful moments and ultimately led to this blog even existing. Often I feel that same urging to hand one of my books to someone. Most of the time I am anxious to share my journey through losing Ryan in book form. But occasionally I second guess if I should. That is when I feel His gentle nudge. 

I plan to begin my podcast soon. It seems something is always getting in the way. One of my biggest mistakes is believing I have to have it all figured out before I launch. Who am I kidding? God has this and will guide me step by step along the way. The fear of failure is not what He whispers in my ear. Rather he assures me that He will walk beside me through this journey. After all, He gave me the podcast name….Stepping Out with Jesus. You would think that would be all I need to trust Him.

Someone asked if I ever hear God’s voice. No. I don’t hear His audible voice but He speaks to me through His Word, other people, and those gentle nudges He often shares. Jesus is always just a whisper away when I take the time to be still and let Him guide me. I love that. There is never a moment I need to take a single step without Him holding my hand and guiding my way.

In Him,

Joyful

1-21-26

 

Including Others as I Hope They Include Me

 

Such a simple choice or turn of a block. It is the difference from feeling that we are enough and that we are somehow lacking. I want to say I am a person who includes others but do I really? How many times do I avoid someone in the grocery store to protect myself from an uncomfortable conversation? Do I actually pick up the phone and make that call when God puts someone on my heart? It is easy to measure our inclusion of others by the ways we do include them while skirting around the ways we exclude others. The child in all of us worries about being picked last for kickball or not receiving an invitation to that birthday party. The child in our adult hearts prays we will be included not left out and excluded.

A friend of mine is good at planning gatherings with groups that enjoy one another. I like when everyone moves from seat to seat to converse with people around the room. That is why a home party is better than a restaurant. There is the ability to chat with everyone not just the person sitting next to me. 

I am not good at having groups of people at my home but I do love having one or two friends over for coffee and to catch up. But the truth is that I think of so many people that I would love to spend time with but I just don’t make it happen. It doesn’t mean that they are not in my thoughts but I don’t take the action required to get together. Our little town is small with one grocery store. You would think I would run into those people and at least have a mini interaction. But I can live in my small town and not see someone for years. That always fascinates me. 

So this year am I going to make a list like Ronnie B did with his breakfast list and be intentional about getting together with those who claim a piece of my heart if not a spot on my calendar? I hope so. Ron has his breakfast list so we intentionally go to breakfast on Saturdays with people. I love that. 

Including others matters. The golden rule in the Bible is worth repeating in the New Testament. My wrist tattoo of 1 Corinthians 16:14 let love and kindness be the motivation in all you do is a reminder for me to lead with love and include others. Rules are meant to be followed not broken so this year I am going to try my best to create a coffee list of those I with to include and hope to actually invite them into conversation. If you don’t hear from me, call me. I love to be included too.

In Him,

Joyful

1–8-26

Come for Coffee or a Beer. Yep, that is Volunteering to Show Up

 

Lend a hand here or there. Don’t just donate my money but my time and talent. This year my word is serve. That means getting off my couch and contributing whenever and wherever a need arises. This is difficult for me since I have trauma induced autism……my coined phrase for how I stepped out of social after losing Ryan. What I know is that I want to serve others and be involved but it takes saying yes when my heart wants to stay in the no and isolate. So how do I get back on the horse and serve? One yes at a time. This season of showing up whether on a one time only or on a calendar repeat is only possible if I am intentional. 

Where do you put others first? In church, community, family all of these are opportunities to step up. Yesterday was a day of meeting new people that crossed Ronnie B and my path. In the morning we went for coffee and met Cindy who is here caring for her older aunt. She is looking to move here permanently and wants to build friendships. This morning she is coming to our home for coffee. Yes I did say yes and step out of my comfort zone. 

Last night we went out for Taco Tuesday at our local tub and met a family who also intends to move here. The eighty year old great grandma is looking for a group of women who like to gather for an occasional beer. She hit the jackpot. I am going to take her next Monday to the Tubbies group. I rarely go but love that this group includes me in their texts and activities. Sandra will enjoy meeting new ladies and getting out. She lives with her granddaughter’s family and loves it. But she also needs friends her own age and the Tubbies are an incredibly inclusive group. It is fun getting together with Christian women in their 60s, 70s, and 80s who appreciate a drink or two while chatting away.

Volunteering doesn’t always mean helping someone lug furniture during a move or shoveling snow from a driveway. Sometimes volunteering is welcoming a new person into your home or your life. Who knows, you may just be making a new lifelong friend.

In Him,

Joyful

12-31-25

Let Them Be and Serve Others as Best I Can

 

This was a lesson I learned well when I was loving my mom through Alzheimer’s. It wasn’t necessary to correct her and I could endure watching Golden Girls for hours on end. Funny thing is that now that she has been gone over six years, I find myself watching those old episodes on repeat just to remember time spent with her. But this is not just a lesson for loving my mom well. But this way of living and loving others needs to be how I encounter others each and everyday. Heck, other people put up with me and my quirkiness on a daily basis. 

It has taken me a lifetime to relax into just being and not judging or fretting over what seemed off to me. A couple circumstances that come to mind. Always kiss me goodnight is something I hoped Ronnie B would do for me. He always comes to bed after me and rarely woke me up for a kiss. A God poke showed me I could get my kiss if I kissed my guy before I went off to bed. Problem solved. The other heart hurt I have is when families have pictures of all of them together. My kids and grandkids have not all been togerher since Ryan died almost sixteen years ago. God poke showed me I can have a picture of all my family one unit at a time. Ron and I asked the kids to take a family picture for us this Christmas. We are gong to put each of these up in our dining room. Whalaaaa all my family on a wall full of pictures. Why have I spent so long feeling sorry for myself over a kiss or a photo? Because I wanted others to do what I wanted or thought I needed rather than embracing them for who they are. My prayer is still for my grown kids and their families to enjoy being together but if that does not happen I can still enjoy each of them now. 

This year Tanner and Bethany made it for Christmas. It was quiet but incredibly intimate and enjoyable. What a gift it is that Ron and I have such a large family with kids, grands, and greats that we get to spend time with. 

So today as I reflect on who I want to be in 2026 it is to serve others and accept everyone for who they are and enjoy spending time with others in my life. 

So forgive me if I correct you or let my orphan spirit worry that you did not include me. Let me see that others whether my closest friends or the guy behind me in the checkout line are all living the best they know how. Each of us look out at others and assume they have life so much better than we do. The truth is everyone deals with the messiness behind those perfect family pictures. The smiles may have been momentary between conflicts that remain unresolved. Let me assure you that even with the muddy mess that is sometimes my life, there are always joys and love through even the darkest seasons. 

To serve is my hope for 2026. Waiters serve and while we are in waiting seasons it is better to serve than sit and wring our hands. So I am going to be intentional about putting down the games on my phone and spend more time connecting with others. But today, Ronnie B and I are enjoying leftovers and watching football. My Seahawks are on fire. For that I am grateful. Love me even if you are not a Seahawks fan.

In Him,

Joyful

12-28-25

I Strive to Remind You that for those Tears I Died~Peace in Community

 Trust, fear not, turn your hands up to let go of what you cannot control. God knows that we have anxiety about the possibility of loss, death, illness and betrayal. He knows that each of us will face. the hard things life most definitely will throw at us. The truth is none of us lives a life free of heart crushing circumstances. What He also promises that not a one of us has to walk through life’s storms alone. We have community to lean in and comfort us with their embraces and their love. Jesus promises to be only a whisper away in the dark of night when our mind spirals to the worst case scenario. We can be sure that even when things are not as we hoped for or even what we feared, there is hope that each step is toward His light. 

And Jesus said come to the water stand by my side. I know you are thirsty, you won’t be denied. I felt every teardrop when in darkness you cried. And I strive to remind you that for those tears I died. This song has been a comfort throughout my life. It is His promise that I don’t grieve alone. That He is ever present in my story and provides others to share my journey. 

Step close if you or someone you love is going through uncertainty. Wrap your love and support around others and let others wrap you in their arms. We were made to live life in community not alone in our bed. Fear is real but so is the comfort that comes with openly sharing our fears with others. Don’t make the mistake of telling yourself that everything is going to be alright. It will be what it will be but the good thing is that we will walk through the even if together. Then celebrate and rejoice that God knows our steps and will lead us by the hand through even the most difficult situations. 

I would never choose to lose my son to suicide or have a son who is homeless in Los Angeles but here I am worrying about the son who still lives and at peace with the fact that one of my sons is safely in Jesus’ arms. The blessings that have come over the past fifteen years since losing Ryan don’t change the fact that I would change it if I could. But because it is my reality, I embrace the ways God has allowed me to touch others because of my walk through loss. Life is going to have hills and valleys, sunny days and stormy ones but I know that I am never alone. I have the opportunity to rejoice and grieve with those in my life who never miss a moment to reach out. For this I am grateful and this gives me peace.

In Him,

Joyful

11-11-25

Encouragement Keeps Me Moving in Love

 This has been a week of encouragement, reflection and a mirror of my walk through life. Sometimes it is easy to punch myself for what I am not doing. What goes undone or unsaid can cause meto lay my head on my pillow at night and dwell on regrets. Who didn’t I reach out to that I should have? How could I have better lived my life verse of let love and kindness be the motivation in all you do. 1 Corinthians 16-14. But this week God showed me through encouraging words of others that even with missed opportunities, I am at a place in life where I am getting it right more often than not. This is not me bragging but becoming aware of how God has moved me to lean into His purpose for my life. 

I often write about the power each of us has to encourage others. Encouragement matters. It matters to keep me going in the ways I am getting it right and the power to turn away from the missteps that still occur. Thank you to each of you who reached out and lifted me up. Let me share one of these heartfelt words that Donna sent me that brought tears to my heart as they allowed me to see myself through not only her eyes but Jesus’ eyes as well. 

Barb-  I don’t say it much cause I’ve usually been a mess, but I want you to know how precious you are to me! There are no words that could be said and really convey the love that Abba pours through you. You are grace in action which moves Heaven and Earth in the hearts of people. I love you, You are cherished by Heaven and me.   Lots of love always-

This sweet card that arrived via snail mail will be one of my most treasured possessions. It gives me a glimpse of how my heart is seen. It matters that my sweet friend took the time to find this perfect way of lifting me up. That is what each of us needs to strive to do in one another’s lives. Thank you Donna for keeping me moving in the direction of knowing Him and making Him known. I will stumble but God uses even those to share His love for me and for others in my path. 

In Him,

Joyful

11-8-25

An Encourager is Who I Long to be

 I want to be an encourager of others more than anything. To support and encourage rather than judge and condemn is my life goal. It is how i want to live and how I want to be remembered. That others will say that I showed up when they needed me to be a cheerleader or a shoulder to weep on is my life mission. Jesus, Others, then Yourself is an acronym for JOY. I must spend time with Jesus and follow His steps of never being too busy or focused on my destination to pause when someone needs my presence. He set the example of being willing to be interrupted by others throughout His life. 

The truth is that doctor’s appointments can be changed, a video can be watched later, and although I love a good pedicure, I can wait a day or two to get one. There are few calendar events that cannot be cancelled or changed. It is my willingness to sidestep when someone needs me that matters most. Encourage to give courage to others, to inspire them to take the next step. Sometimes it is not simply a hug but a roll up my sleeves and do the next thing along side them that will keep them moving forward. 

Rather than saying I will pray for you, how about if I pick up the phone and actually pray with them right then and there. Even a texted prayer can be powerful as they can pick it up and let my words wash over them again and again. But I have to choose to show up. To poke the pause button on something on my schedule and offer my time. 

Please encourage me to be an encourager. That is how we all get through life in community.

In Him,

Joyful

10-25-25

First Things First, Coffee and Jesus

Prayer is my time spent with the one who loves me most. My early morning conversations are the time to connect with Him. It is too often that I let other things get in the way of this time that sets my day on the right track. So why do I get distracted and not have that first thing in the morning chat with Jesus? To be real it is not being in my spot. That makes me just like Sheldon on the Big Bang Theory. Now Jesus will meet me wherever I am and I know that. But when we travel or have guests in our home, I get distracted. When I talk to Jesus first I then I don’t do my Bible study or blog. Those three things set my day and yet I let distractions interrupt. 

So I am taking Megan Marshman’s advice of saying a quick prayer when I make my coffee in my Keurig. It is a brief moment to start my day. Trust me, I never forget to make my coffee or get distracted from coffee. How sad is that to admit but now I am instituting this new routine. Jesus and coffee what a way to begin my day. What do you do to remember to spend time with Jesus? Let me know.

In Him,

Joyful

10-20-25

Stepping out with Jesus

Be open handed with the plan but keep a firm grip on the purpose. Steven Furtick

My life goal is to know Him and to make Him known. That is my purpose. To build an ever closer relationship with Jesus and to help others see the gift that is His presence in my life. To share His unconditional love for them and how they never have to take a step without Him right next to them. The gift of His presence is what I hope to share with any and everyone who crosses my path. That is my purpose to not only make heaven more crowded but to have others have a relationship with Jesus here on earth. 

My plan has been to continue sharing my life and my faith with each of you through my blog. It is a selfish plan since it is so healing for me and gives me a voice to share. Then came the book. Not a book that I wrote but a journal of my walk through losing my son to suicide. It was proof for me and for others that Jesus never left me for a moment in my grief but surrounded me with others to love me through the tears. It was my plan to share that journey right here on my page but God had other plans. Leona turned it into a book as a gift to me and with the help of Susi, Leona, and others it became a book to share. Now I keep this with me to give to others who I meet throughout my daily travels. I never expected to connect with so many people the story of God’s love in my life. But here I am buying author’s copies a hundred books at a time to give to people who cross my path. 

In 2023, God put it on my heart to start a podcast to share more of my story. The adoption of my family, the classroom that I had, Young Life tales, and raising my kids. How do you title something that needs to encompass life in general? I had no idea. God said Stepping Out With Jesus. Not stepping out for Jesus but with Jesus. That is perfect. Because I don’t ever want to take a step without Him. I don’t want others to have to face life without Him. So I got the website on Anchor podcasts and wrote a couple episodes. I even went through old blog posts to see what needed to be included. Then I got long covid. Here it is two years later and I have not put this into motion. 

Whether it is fear, laziness, or just excuses this has been on my heart but not in my hands. It has occurred to me that I need an accountability partner to press me to stop waiting and move. I don’t need all the details or the promise of success. I just need to put my heart out there on the airwaves like I do here with you. 

I have asked a couple people to cohost with me thinking that would be the motivation to step up. That did not go as planned. On a recent trip, I met a heart sister who would be perfect to share this vision with me. We are connected on so many levels in life. But maybe rather than seeking a cohost I need to have contributors to my podcast and man up and keep the purpose in my hands while the reins remain in God’s hands. So here I sit once again motivated and encouraged that God has this. I just need to stay close enough to hear His steps for moving forward. After all, it is Stepping Out With Jesus.

In Him,

Joyful

9-16-25

European Trip and the Most Heartfelt Encounters

 

What an honor I have been given to share my story with the most incredible people on the planet. This is Juan from Chili serving others with his contagious smile. To share our stories was a treat. He misses his Madre who is oceans away. I shared my book on losing my son and my faith walk after that loss with this twenty-six year old. He brought us dessert and insisted on a photo and a hug. 

For the past five years God has given me the gift of boldness to share how I live my life stepping out with Jesus always by my side. Hearing other people’s story as I gift them mine connects us in the most special way. God does that. 

This is Lexi. She is studying in Dublin for a semester. She will turn twenty-one here. I bought her an iced coffee and listened to her adventures and how she misses her mom. She is so grateful for FaceTime to connect. I got to jot a note in her book about how courageous she is in this adventure. 

Another book went to Jerome in Killarney who spends his day writing in his bakery. He doesn’t think anyone would be interested in his words but I did my best to convince him otherwise. Still another to a young waiter named Dave who was especially helpful and pleasant. He gave me my first ever gin and tonic. Okay I chose to drink that particular drink because of the pretty blue bottle. When I shared my book and my story, he shared the loss of a close friend to suicide two weeks before. He pushed up his sleeve and had a tattoo for Dylan on his wrist right where I have mine for Ryan and Hector. The embrace that followed was life giving. Connections bring us together in the most incredible ways. Then there was the young waitress in Dingle that had the scars of cutting up and down her arm. I shared how Alicia and I started writing because she craved the blade. Writing was an alternative to cutting. This waitress did not cover her scars but shared them with the knowledge that they were not to be ashamed of but to show what she had overcome. Each of us needs that lesson to share the hard things we have lived through.

Our trip was an archeology tour of Ireland  in the eleven days we shared our group became family  Each of us has a story that needed to be shared  I am sure many of us will become lifelong friends  As I gave each one my story in book form their own heartaches came out. Even our bus driver and guide had a twenty something daughter he needs prayers for. Connecting and expanding our prayer circle is the greatest gift of the trip  

Finally, on our plane from Dublin to Barcelona we were by the most loving young mother. She had two girls who were more than a handful. Her nonverbal daughter was overwhelmed with her first plane ride and shrieked most of the trip. Did this disturb others? Absolutely. But this mom did not let that upset her. She loved her daughters through this without ever apologizing for who they are or how they handled this terrifying adventure. I let her know in the cover of my book just how much I admire her for staying calm in the chaos.

God gives me opportunities each and everyday to connect with others and let them know how much they positively impact those around them. I am beyond thankful to connect with people and let Jesus be the center of each encounter. 

I left New Mexico with twenty-five books and have two left. I can’t wait to see who the next two are that will fill my heart with joy. 

In Him,

Joyful

9-10-25

God is Our Father and Wants to Listen to All Our Prayers

 

Pastor Shawn Johnson of Red Rocks Church is doing a series on Let’s Talk About It and what a powerful word on prayer. Prayer is after all about being in relationship with Jesus. I listened to the second sermon today and it is worth sharing. https://youtu.be/N6tRUJZ2tkI?si=_JxPepdWS9ysdW-T

First when I am praying I need to remember these truths that God is my Father who loves me and wants to spend time listening to me. He can handle even my darkest shames and embraces me even when He doesn’t give me a yes to every ask. It is comforting that there is nothing I can do that will lessen His love for me. His love is like that of a parent and is unconditional. Praying and reading His word keeps me close to Him. It gives me a better chance to hear His voice and allows Him to guide my steps. Having a conversation with Him is simple when I am reminded of who it is I am speaking with……..my father.

This is a perfect reminder of how to pray and Jesus gave it to me in His Word. Don’t start with what I need but with who God is…..my Father. 

When I pray and I am finding it hard to find the right words, I can always pray the prayer He gave me that has all that I need to say. He wants me to come to Him with praise, repentance, direction  requests, and to temper those requests in His will. I love when I am in church and the whole congregation recites the Lord’s Prayer. 

Another way to pray is to pray the Bible. Especially the Psalms are a way to pray when I can’t find the words. Years ago I lead an incredible group of middle school Young Life girls and we came up with three word prayers. It was a powerful, simple way to pray. Each of us had a prayer and we prayed them for one another. Mine was under one roof. You see Ronnie B and I were separated at the time. My heart’s desire was to renew our relationship and love and live under one roof. God granted that prayer that these young ladies deligently prayed for me. What an act of love. Many of them are still in my life and are one of the greatest gifts God has given me. 

The Lord’s Prayer is set up like this. But Shawn shared this simple way of directing my prayers. First praise, then ask for forgiveness, then bring my requests in His will, and finally ask for direction for Him to show me the way. I love that. 

Once a friend believed that she needed a certain friend to pray for a frightening circumstance. She believed that this lady’s prayers would somehow be more powerful or be heard above her prayers or mine. The truth is each of us can connect with our Father and He listens and loves all of us. Our prayers don’t have to be in a certain place. They don’t have to be elegant or have a certain cadence to them. They can be as simple as three words. God loves each of us and hears our prayers in all languages, locations, and wants to spend time in conversation with us. What a comforting thought that is. 

Please consider clicking the link and listening to Pastor Shawn Johnson. He is a powerful speaker and the bonus is that he is relatable and very good looking. You are welcome ladies. lol

In Him,

Joyful

8-20-25