Growing My Way Through My Senior Years

 I spoke to a friend yesterday who is nearing retirement from her lifelong career. She pondered that sweet she is winding down yet at the same time still learning to better serve those she interacts with. This is so important. We never stop growing, learning, and experiencing new things in life. Although it can also be true that a lifetime of learning has given us a toolbox of what works and what doesn’t. That is why it is so important to share our finds with younger people who have not had the decades of growth. 

It is such a joy to know that Ronnie B and I are going to Kenya to the school/orphanage we support.  (Connect with a Childis their website if you want more information or to donate) Tom Abungu is allowing me to take all my tricks of the trade from my special ed career and share them with his teachers. He told me they have not had special ed training and would appreciate any tips that could help one of their students. While I have a plethora of ideas to share, I also know that this meeting will grow me as much as it grows them. What an opportunity to share with those who are in the trenches in this foreign land and who love their kiddos enough to take time to grow. 

Each day is a growing opportunity. That is why I get up early to do my Bible study. It is not only to be closely connected to Jesus but also to learn something that hits my heart in a different way in this season of life. Today I learned that each of us does not hear from God in the same way. I would not have thought of myself as a knower but that is my main way to hear Him. I like to say that God gently pressed into my back and nudged me to act. Too often, I resist before moving into His plan but when I do it always creates a powerful connection. There should be a growing aspect of each day. Some will be small and barely noticeable while others can make me need to go out and buy new shoes. Okay, maybe it is not about my feet growing but rather my heart and my head. 

When we launch on our trip Thursday to Egypt and Kenya the growing won’t start when we land in Cairo. The people we meet in the airports and on the plane have the power to connect with us and grow our lives. I recall flying from Ireland to Barcelona last year. There was a young mom with three littles. One had autism and was understandably melting down on a plane full of strangers and stimui. This mom did not apologize or get frazzled by her kiddos loudly annoying other passengers. Because she remained calm her young one eventually relaxed into his surroundings. How often I panic and get worked up when things aren’t going as I expected. That does nothing to shift the situation but exasperates it. This mom taught me to take a breath, live through the moment and most importantly not to apologize for what is unavoidable. My hope is she will not avoid flying with her littles in the future just because of the nasty looks she received. I gave her my book and told her how inspiring she was with how she handled her kiddos. 

I look forward to meeting people on our journey, on our group tour and at the teacher meeting. It is pretty clear that the next few weeks will be a growing season for Ronnie B and me. I am not taking my iPad so may not blog much but will be posting on Facebook. Barbara Friedman Barber. Please join our journey there. Tell me how God grows you in the next few weeks whether through His word on your couch or off on an international adventure. 

In Him,

Joyful

10-19-26

Jean is a SeaGlass Friend, So are You!

 What a gift our friends are in our lives. I appreciate my been there fro decades friends who can remember my parents and all the growing pains of teenage and early adult years. Those who came into my life as we raised our kids together share the memories of busy schedules and houses filled with chaos, exhaustion, and joy. There are those who lived with each other through the tragedies of life and were a constant presence to get us through. Then there are the friends who stepped away for a season but returned to be one of our closest confidants and support. It is how we walk side by side with old friends and those who just showed up but quickly became family that strengthens us. 

I met Jean on our trip to Ireland. She just clicked. That she closely resembles my grandma helped but it was really her heart that drew me to her. Although she lives states away and I rarely take time to pick up the phone, she crosses my mind often. There is something connecting us and I know we will be in each other’s lives from now on. Will we ever be together again in person? That is to be determined but doesn’t change the closeness that just is. It is not clear why we have an instant bond with someone but it happens. What a magical thing when it does. I just want to say that my life is fuller because I met her and the fact that she sent cookies for my Dolly Parton party is not why I love this lady. 

Let’s treasure those rare people who enrich our lives just by being apart of it. Whether present in our daily routines or present in our hearts the people that we cherish and those who cherish us are the true gifts of life. My hope is to be better at intentionally reaching out when they cross my mind. I know several friends who have a set time to group chat during the week with those they love. I want to do that. It seems I always think of Jean on Sundays yet I never call. Her son spends weekends with her and I don’t want to interrupt their time together. So I need to call my friend and set up a time that is convenient to both of us to spend time catching up and growing deeper in our friendship. 

How about you? Who do you need to prioritize to make your week shine just a little brighter  through a conversation? Or what if we chose to send a snail mail touch that would surprise them when they went from their mailbox to the recycle to toss the never ending junk mail? Just a thought. I think I will call Jean today and ask what time works for her. If not today I will get distracted and let it slip by. I will let you know how this works for us. Let me know how you stay in contact with those that make your life sweeter just by being in it.

In Him,

Joyful

10-18-26

Egypt has Swimming……Who Knew? Now I Really am Excited!

 In less than a week we will be in Cairo embarking on an adventure I never imagined I would take. This archeology trip sponsored by Jornada Institute is the third we have been on. Ronnie B knows that no trip is a success for me unless there is a bit of water time included. After drizzly Ireland we went to Barcelona for beach time and sun. Now I find out that we will be staying at this hotel in Aswan right on the Nile River. Wow! I guess I will get to swim after all. Ron says I won’t be able to swim in the Nile because it may have critters that would be dangerous to my health. Well, you can bet even if I can’t swim in it, I will put my feet in that water. After all, a pool is not my first choice of swim venues. I much prefer lakes, rivers, surf, or even ponds. But I will spend some time in this cement pond while others explore ancient sites. The temperatures should be perfect for a leisurely swim unlike my frigid dips in Greece. 

Let me explain that I have never been a world traveler. My mom and sister never flew on a plane until Ronnie B and I were expecting our first adoption. But a few years ago, Ron encouraged me to go on Dave Greenwald’s trips with him. So here I am ready to embark on number three and excited to explore a place I never realized I would be excited to visit. Who knows where else we will explore in this travel filled retirement? Although I love being home with my sweet cat curled up beside me, I am getting more confident traveling. 

The saying parents are spending their kids inheritance seems like a selfish way to live. Rather enjoying life to the fullest is an inheritance. The example to live life to the fullest and spend time together with others. We end our trip in Kenya with Tom Abungu who runs an orphanage and school there.  I am going to share some of my teacher tools that I have found effective over a lifetime of teaching. Ron and I are excited to spend time there on Safari and with the young people who have stayed in our home. 

Life is unpredictable and we don’t have a magic eight ball to see what the next couple decades hold. For now, we are both healthy enough to travel so we are. Whether it is flying across an ocean or moving north in our little rv to the northwest to see family, we are loving life together. For that I am grateful. Next June, Ron and I celebrate our fiftieth anniversary. Fifty years of being Barbara Barber. Wow! I really think that all the seasons of our life have been a blend of challenges and joy. But this season is quieter in so many ways yet filled with more family than we dared to dream of having. I feel beyond blessed to be a mom and Noni to so many. God is good all the time.

Pray for our safety and follow our adventure on FB or instagram at Barbara Friedman Barber. I hope to share photos and snippets along the way. Love you all for reading my heart story.

In Him,

Joyful

10-17-26

So Much More Beautiful than You Know

 You are more beautiful than the you that you see in your mirror. Let’s not get caught up in the wrinkles, blemishes, or crooked nose. What others see in you is the sparkle in your eye, the smile that lights up their day, and the face that reminds them they are loved. Wouldn’t  it be marvelous if we could see ourselves as others see us. Peeking right down to our core not seemingly aware of the flaws we focus on. 

My Dad had little red veins that ran around his face. When I looked at him they weren’t even present. What I saw was an ornery dad who knew how to push my buttons, make me chuckle and who never went a day without offering me candy from his candy drawer. He shared his generous spirit with me and for that I am grateful. I got his just give it away heart. He never worried if he would need something in the future. If someone had a need my dad would fill it not concerned for himself. Once I came home from college with an acquaintance to work on a school project. She lived in Flagstaff in a tiny trailer and the temperatures were dropping to freezing. Mom and Dad had just bought a knew space heater for our home. Dad took it out and put it in the car for her. My Mom about lost it since it was expensive. Dad didn’t base his gift on her being a close friend or the cost of the gift. He saw a need and filled it. My Dad’s beauty was the sparkle in his crystal blue eyes and the selfless life he lived. 

Each of us would be so much happier if we could see ourselves through the lens of other people’s eyes. Our beauty shines past the flaws we focus on. Somehow our hearts shine through our eyes and that is the us others see in pictures, in person and even through phone calls. I can imagine my Aunt Laura’s face as she shares a blessing with me. Her words are precious but the love that oozes from her face is the true blessing. I need to have my cousin record her so I can have her love with me whenever I need a reminder of how loved I am. 

As you brush your teeth this morning, take a moment to look into your own eyes and know that you are a true beauty inside and out. Be assured that you are loved and lovable. Focus on that and be sure to put the lid on the toothpaste so you are not also a pain. 

In Him,

Joyful

10-16-26

Packing My Bags Before I Get to the Airport!

So I am starting to pack for our Egypt and Kenya trip that we fly off to a week from tomorrow. I am not waiting to buy luggage at the airport….duh! But this is certainly a process. Why? I act like there won’t be a store anywhere that I am going. The truth is we are going with an archeology group we have gone on trips with before. So I know we will be staying at upscale hotels and I can imagine there will be shops with anything I might have forgotten. But here I am with everything laid out in our spare room that I am calling my staging room. There are multiple notebooks that contain copious lists of what to take and what needs to be accomplished before I go. 

In the midst of all this. I am trying to be mindful of wearing appropriate clothes for the weather as well as the culture. Somehow I don’t think my usual leggings will be conservative enough over there. Who knew I was such a provocative dresser in my everyday life. But here I am having a fashion show so Lissa can reassure me that my monk like clothing will be acceptable and not sweltering. I did buy a scarf to cover my hair when we go in the Mosuque. 

Now the trick is to get all this into one carryon bag and one backpack. I refuse to take more than that. Ronnie B has converted me to being a minimalist on trips. Usually I also take half a suitcase of books to give away. This time I am only taking a handful. My kindle needs to be loaded with books I may or may not have time to read. We still need to get Cora to Mike and Deb’s in Flagstaff and share phone numbers with Thomas who is staying at our home. Just in case there is an emergency or if he needs to borrow a cup of sugar. Wait! I have plenty of sugar. The good news is I don’t have to pack all the lists I have created. Hopefully, there will be time to put away all I decide not to take so the spare room is uncluttered in case someone needs to spend a night or two while we are gone. 

It is time to get excited with knowing all we will see and learn along the way. That I get to do this adventure with my Ronnie B and some good friends is the best part. When we are in Kenya visiting the orphanage that Tom Abungu runs, I will have the opportunity to do a workshop for the teachers there. All the little tricks that I used over decades of teaching need to be shared. I am grateful for the opportunity to give while we are there. This trip has layers of wonderful and I can’t wait for the adventure to begin. Thank you my Ronnie B for encouraging me to experience more than I ever would on my own. Africa here we come!

In Him,

Joyful

10-14-26

 

Share Your Light and Stand in the Light of Others

Let their warmth and joy spread over you like a blanket of love. Be the one who gives light and life to others. We all want to crowd around that person who makes us feel seen and cherished. Be a better listener since each of us longs to be heard.                                                                              Don’t shy away from the gloomy people. Rather bring your sunshine to them. When we are in a dark moment, we long for a break in the clouds. We can be that light for one another.  It is okay not to speak about every ache, pain, or fear. Be mindful about who you share your woes with. Are they a person who can guide you toward a solutions or are they going to just wallow with you in the gloom? I know I can get caught up on repeat when I am hurting but it doesn’t help the ache go away to verbalize it continuously. Rather it focuses me on that one thorn in my side rather than letting all the light that is present to shine. 

So today, rather than sharing my rather annoying earache with you I am choosing to tell you what my day will look like with a clogged ear. I am going down to Santa Fe on the sunny day in my FancyPants convertible with the top down and the music on blast. Evelyn is going to cut my hair to perfection for my upcoming trip. Then I am going to go try on pants that are appropriate for Egypt. I mostly wear leggings that are a bit to form fitting for their culture. I am taking a sunshiny person with me so laughter will out loud the music. It should be a fun day filled with light.

Recently Jenn told me I was should ping all over her about something.. Well today I am going to should all over you. You should find someone to get close to that brings joy to your day. You should spill your own joy onto others rather than being the dark cloud. Even in a drought when we are praying for rain the moment the sun comes out we smile. Let the sun shine on you with the top down in your convertible. Fell the warmth on your face and when there is a drizzle be the light with the top up. Don’t forget your sunscreen and enjoy your day and each other. 

In Him,

Joyful

10-13-26

 

A Gentle Nudge and a Warm Connection

 A gentle nudge to move me in the right direction. A soft hand on my back to remind me of the way I should go. A tender voice letting me know that I am loved and enough. This is my Father’s touch. Over the years I have not heard the audible voice of God but felt his presence and direction clearly. 

The relationship between us is built when I spend time in silence, in His word, or in conversation through prayer and worship. Relationships need presence and the time to stay connected. That is my goal……..to know Him and to make Him known. Too often when I was younger I got caught up in the busyness of life and let my time with Him be a task that I never got to. At the end of the day or early in the morning He waits. But He was also there in the carpool line when picking up kids or the grocery store waiting to check out. It is not complicated but it needs to be intentional. Just utter a three word prayer to check in. Think of it as a quick call to let a loved one know you are thinking of them. You don’t need to speak for an hour or share every detail of the past week, just reach out. Letting others know they are in our thoughts matters enough to shift a lonely day into one of connection. God is there to listen and be present in my life anytime, anywhere not just by my bed on my knees. 

So I listen for the gentle nudge to move me down my path. But I also am intentional to say Good Morning Lord as my keurig fills my cup each morning. I give a quick I’m here as I make my bed. There is a moment spent with Jesus as I brush my teeth and fix my bed head hair. Being intentional to connect helps me live out life the way I choose. 

I try my best to feel and respond to the gentle nudge of God and those He has placed in my life to guide me. A perfect example is when I share the book that was created out of a decade navigating the loss of my son. When God prompts me to gift a book to someone I meet in my day it is never to be ignored. The stories I have heard from those I have said yes to are powerful. The last book I shared with a waiter at a restaurant shared that he had lost his own father to suicide in 2022. He told Jenn and me of the journey he had been on absorbing this part of his own story. I am so glad I didn’t ignore God’s hand on the small of my back leading me to walk out to the car and get a book to share with this young man. 

Please listen to the small voice and connect with God and with others throughout your day. Please be intentional about prioritizing during the mundane tasks of your day to speak to others and to your Heavenly Father. Your life will be enriched, your direction will be a bit clearer and you will encourage others knowing they are in your thoughts and prayers. I appreciate each of you who read my heart on this page. Please consider following to see when I write. 

In Him,

Joyful

10-9-26