Morning Coffee on this Pleasant Spring Morning

 Good morning, good morning what a lovely spring day it is today. I am sitting here at my granddaughter’s apartment with a hot cup of coffee waiting for her two kiddos to wake up and snuggle. Elissa is already off to do her last day of clinicals for phlebotomy. I arrived before six am so she could be out the door. Next fall, she will begin nursing school and there will be other opportunities for me to get the kids off to school. I love that she lives in our little town. The rest of my kids live in other states so this is a real treasure to have her close. 

Spring is such a magical time as all the plants are budding out and the air is filled with the sweet scent from the blooms. It is going to be in the seventies today not too hot and not too cold. As Goldilocks would say~just right! The mornings are crisp and the afternoons are the perfect temperature to read a book out on our deck. I just love this retired life that I get to enjoy. I think the only time of year I enjoy more than this May moment is in July when the reverse is true. Warm mornings and then the thunderous monsoon rains that cool the air with so much drama. That is a time to read a book under the shelter of the patio cover. Do you sense a theme of relaxation with a good book? I am currently reading one called What I Should Have Said. Ronnie B prefers non-fiction while I am a fiction girl. Rarely do we read the same thing but it is nice to sit together in the quiet both consuming words on a page.  Speaking of reading can I just say that Ron never reads my blog. He prefers I read it to him. That is when I find all the mistakes that you no doubt notice. His comment after listening is always the same. He tells me that is a good one and that he is glad I write. 

Peaceful moments are more the norm now than when my kids were little. But I as do miss all the scurrying around to get off to school and work. The quiet is nice especially when I know that two toddlers will soon wake up and this Noni will get to once again feed, clothe and snuggle them off to school. I love their sweet voices and clever comments. A few days ago, I hit a deer on my way over here. It was traumatic for the deer and for me. The deer got up and ran off seemingly unharmed. My car took the brunt of the encounter. Caleb, who is three looked at the damage to my car and was concerned. As we drove to school there were of course other deer along the road. He asked me to roll down his window. I did and he hollered out the window for the naughty deer to not hit his Noni’s car. That was precious! He knows exactly what naughty looks like and he has heard his mom and I worrying about the deer darting into oncoming traffic. His scolding lent humor to a stressful situation. I am beyond blessed with the kids in my life. 

Now to finish my coffee before it gets cold and the real day begins. Hope your day is full of peaceful, humorous, and moments shared with others. 

In Him,

Joyful

5-8-26

Deer, Deer Everywhere from My Backporch to the Front of My Car

The deer in our town are everywhere. Here is one eating apples on my backporch. This is early morning taken out my kitchen door. They are not afraid of us and seem to just live among us. It is great to see these magnificent creatures until they eat our flowers and destroy our trees. They also bring the mountain lions into our neighborhoods.I love seeing the deer but do get annoyed when they just stand and look at me in the middle of the road. I just have to sit and wait for them to move along at their leisure.

Recently, I have been driving past our golf course at 5:30 in the morning. It is still dark as the sun is just coming up. I have been heading over to get my great grandkids off to school since Elissa needs to be at clinicals by 6:00 for phlebotomy. There are dozens of deer roaming every morning. They bolt across the street and a couple of friends have even had them run into the side of their cars. I won’t even drive my Miata since I am terrified of hitting a deer or being hit by one. Well, a couple days ago my luck ran out. One ran so fast across the road I barely had time to brake. It was not enough to keep me from hitting the poor doe. She got up instantly and ran off seemingly unharmed. I was okay but my car has deer fur and dents that may cause them to total it.  The damage doesn’t look that bad but being an older car it may not be worth the cost to repair. I thought of Ryan when I saw the deer fur/hair. He would have gathered it to tie flies for fishing. That made me smile in a stressful situation. 

I don’t know if I will get to continue driving my perfect car for me. But I do know that I am grateful the deer seemed okay and that nobody got hurt. Even when we are alert to a possibility it doesn’t mean we can prevent it. This is true not only with deer crossings but other situations in life. What I do know is that when bumps or deer in the road happen, God is there to walk beside me and carry me through. It will be an adventure to deal with the insurance company and determine if I continue driving the car I longed for or if I find a new ride that will keep me safe on my adventures. I’m so glad I was smart enough to not drive my Miata/Fancypants early in the morning. This could be a much different post if I hit the deer in her. Grateful~blessed~feeling fortunate today and always. 

In Him,

Joyful

5-7-26

 

Did I Say What I Meant to Say? Did You Hear What I Actually Said or Huh?

 Too often what we say doesn’t match our intentions. I am pretty sure this is not a restaurant that wants a bunch of naked diners, but that could be the outcome if people obey the sign that is posted. I believe I am being clear with my words but am I really? Does the person I am speaking to receive what I said or what I thought I said? Then when I am misinterpreted the frustration is with the other person when in fact I was not clear. 

Wouldn’t it be great if there was an app that could change what we say to what we meant to say. Jenn is reading a book about what we say and when we say it and hopefully how to change bad habits in blurting out thoughts that should remain in our heads. I am reading a novel called What I Should Have Said. It seems all around me are reminders of what to say and when to say it. It is also evident that I need to look at people’s hearts not only their words. Perhaps the meaning behind their words don’t match the words themselves. 

This is precisely why a) I need to talk less. b) I shouldn’t get offended by what others say but pause and clarify. c) I am allowed to be random and confuse others with my weirdness sometimes. d) I will not enter eating establishments without clothes on. After all, that would be inappropriate. Maybe it all comes down to common sense. Now maybe I need an app that gives me more common sense rather than an interpreting app. 

Enjoy your day whether you are wearing a bathing suit and flip flops or an evening gown and heels. Just be sure to wear them where appropriate. Or not if you wish to confuse others. That is always my plan.

In Him,

Joyful

5-6-26

Ronnie B Looking Good at Seventy

 Ronnie B is going to be seventy! Wow! I love this invitation Natalie made for his party that will be at her house. It will be fun to celebrate my rugged man who loves the outdoors and gets out in it often. First, we will travel with our dog, Cora, in the rv to get there. That will be an adventure of hot springs along the way and a bit of archeology for Indiana Ron. The hope is that family and some friends can gather to tell tales of Ron’s life and mischief. Even Ron is thinking about what he wants to share. 

At my seventieth people brought recipes. For Ron’s we want to have them bring memories, the more embarrassing the better. Ron is a man of many talents and many loves. He loves archeology, his family, friends, and researching past cultures as well as his own roots. Recently, his love is our Cora dog. I would never believe Ron would be so attentive to an animal but oh he truly is. 

I have written that entering our seventies feels like we are entering our best life. We both have our health, our family and adventures await. This year we are going to Washington, sailing in the Canadian waters with Ron’s brother Paul and Cindy, taking a trip to Egypt and Kenya, and yesterday found out that a trip to the Bahamas after Thanksgiving may be possible. Ron measures adventures with family and archeology. I measure them with family and when I can get in the water for a swim. 2026 promises to be the start of a decade filled with the two of us exploring the world hand in hand. 

The fact that we get to enjoy family sand friends makes life even sweeter. I love that Auggie FaceTimed me with his dad to let me know that my star pillow is still at their house just waiting for me. At two and a half he already knows me. He said Noni love to watch football and doesn’t like cinnamon coffee. What a gift to see others at such a young age. I can’t wait to get to Washington to watch Kayla graduate, Tim sing,  and snuggle Millie, Auggie and Felix. The added gift is our nieces are also in the northwest so we get to spend time with them as well. You can bet there will be lake days of swimming while we are there. 

Happy Birthday to my Ronnie B, partner in crime. I look forward to you being as old as me. Just remember I am 58 days older than you so I am your elder. But Susi will always be older than both of us so there is that. She made crossing into the seventies look good. Seventies are a time when we have the time, health and resources to enjoy life. So let’s get this party started Mr. Barber. Here’s to you.

In Him,

Joyful

5-3-26

Enjoying the Sunshine of My Life

 The past few weeks I have been feeling like I have something wonderful to share. I am not sure what exactly but just a glow that seems to be present. The truth is that it has been an April to remember since I turned seventy and people I love came out to celebrate me. At the same time, I had to say goodbye to one of my closest friends who journeyed to heaven unexpectedly. Somehow I am so happy for her. She always knew she would be in God’s presence and shared her faith to make heaven a bit more crowded when she arrived. I have been trying to assess why I have this feeling of euphoria. But does it really need to be explained or should I just embrace this positive vibe that is in me? Perhaps I am grateful for what life is in this moment. 

Let’s see……..there was a time in my life that I doubted I would ever be a mom or have a family. Here I am with my kids, their kids, and even their kids. My heart is full of a family I didn’t dare to imagine.

A few years ago, long covid laid me in my bed on oxygen 24/7. The exhaustion was isolating and overwhelming. Having lost my sister to covid, I didn’t have confidence I would survive or ever walk through an airport again out of a wheelchair. Here I am oxygen free or at least supplemental oxygen free. I guess my lungs decided to heal and allow the oxygen around me to be sufficient. My energy is not completely restored but I have learned to budget it to do what I want to do in life. 

I have been jealous of others who have friend circles. Now I have a group that includes me and that makes me feel a part of. The beauty is that there is no pressure. I can show up when I can and that is enough. This group of about twenty is fluid. Everyone travels and has other commitments so there is no judgement when someone is not there. Feeling embraced and loved by this group has been powerful to my mental health and squashes my orphan spirit that plagued me most of my life. 

For most of my life I have not felt beautiful. Plain Jane is how I would describe myself with my mousy brown hair and normal features. I struggled with my weight and never felt pretty. Funny as my face wrinkles and my skin becomes crepey, I am finally seeing the beauty that is me. Beauty is not about big blue eyes or a model body. It is about my heart for others that shines through my eyes. Perhaps I am finally seeing myself as my daughter sees me. A random, selfless person who loves others and that is where my beauty lies. Okay, it helps that I am thinner with Zepbound and have been treating myself to self care at All Dolled Up with Pricilla. She is magic with facials and adding eyebrows that I always longed for.

Ronnie B and I are celebrating forty-nine years of marriage next month as we both slip into our seventies. The love of my life is more my best friend and encourager as we age together. How is it possible that we enjoy each other’s company more now than ever before. Life has not always been easy but we have weathered the storms and ended up here still in each other’s arms. Oh how I adore this man of mine. He is incredible. The smartest person I know. Heck, he even knew about hippo’s spinning tails while they poop. How did he know that. I found out because Caleb, our three year old great-grandson is fascinated with animals pooping on You Tube. We will be heading out in our little rv for six weeks soon. I look forward to snuggling up just the two of us traveling together. Hot springs along the way have become our routine. I love my Ronnie B even more now than ever before. I feel more loved by my Ronnie B than I ever have. What a gift that is to both of us. The fact that we genuinely enjoy being together. 

Now that I think about it, I have so many reasons to feel optimistic and grateful. Life is good, better than good. Life is fantastic. My advice is don’t wait until you turn seventy to see your beauty and the beauty of your life. Even in the struggles there are moments of sunshine.

In Him,

Joyful

5-2-26

Let My Seventies Begin

I am beyond blessed. It has been a beautiful, emotional, and family-filled April so far. These beautiful flowers are from my sweet Freedom who always says and does the kindest things. She makes me feel special and loved. Her words are those I hope to focus on rather than the negatives I tend to put in my own head. I hope that I can live a life that matches the woman she sees in me. 

The past few weeks have been a whirlwind of joy, grief, and community. Ronnie B and I drove to Northern California to celebrate a life that was just short of a century. Aunt Helen was an example of a life well lived through hard work and family. The next week I was honored to speak for my friend Pat at her life celebration. She also was evidence of the impact we all can make through the carefully chosen stitches of her quilts. Her humble generosity and tireless work wrapped others in the love and warmth of her faith and calling. 

Often the loss I experience in life also gives me an opportunity to reflect on my own life and how I am choosing to live. Touching others and the connections are what impacts those around me. Saying yes to opportunities to serve, to connect, share my faith, and to love is the value of life. It is important for me to lean in and embrace opportunities that come but also create those opportunities. 

I have a friend who has shared the impact of aging in a couple of her friends. One is wringing her hands and fretting about everything rather than trusting her life and the ones she loves with Jesus’ love and ability to use even the most difficult circumstances for good. Another moves farther away from others and isolates while making her world smaller and smaller. That is not how I want to move into my seventies. I am already not inclined to be a yes person. So my concern is that I will move away from others rather than toward them. Being intentional in how I spend my time and energy is the way to age well. Am I slowing down in life? Absolutely. But I am grateful for others in life who lift me out of my aloneness and thrust me into community. 

There are new relationships in my life and I am so grateful for the Tubbies for their getting together weekly to hang out and sip a beer or a cider. Go out and find a group to be a part of. Whether it is a church family, a common interest like a book club, or a group of people in their sixties to nineties enjoying a drink together. Find a group to be a part of. This was unexpected for me. These people who have moved from strangers to acquaintances and now some into a family of friends. It has given me the opportunity to make a call to have lunch or coffee with others one on one and really get to know them. 

At Pat’s life celebration, I ended my sharing with Matthew 25:21 Well done my good and faithful servant. There will be time for rest in my seventies, time for gathering with old friends and new, and time for serving others even now. I may not be able to help you move furniture any longer but I can listen and pray. I can pick up the phone to encourage others and connect. I can bake cookies like Heather for those who are celebrating and those who are crushed. I can pray with you and for you and let you pray for me. My seventies are the beginning of my next chapter in life. I am the one who gets to write this next part of my story. So I joined the Tubbies, the gym, and am walking Cora with Ronnie B once again. Who knows where my next deep friendship will develop? What I know for sure is that sitting on my couch playing games on my phone won’t move me to connecting with others and living out my life verse. Let love and kindness be the motivation in all you do. 1 Corinthians 16:14. This is not only how I treat others but also myself. So expect a text or phone call from me. Or hit me up for an adventure. Today I am driving Fancy Pants, my convertible Miata, down for lunch. One friend will let the wind blow through her hair on the way down and another will ride back with me. Who knew indulging my desire for a sports car would be so fabulous. God knows. I just have to listen. It is chilly out today but no worries. My car has heated seats and a great heater. So let the ride begin.

In Him,

Joyful

4-22-26

Oops! I Said it Again

 Ok, that is a bit of a stretch but I do have random thoughts at all times. It is true that some, not all, of them need to be shared. I am learning that the weirder they are the more selective I must be in choosing who to share them with. There are laws you know about when, where and to whom we share our inappropriate thoughts. 

A couple days ago, Jenn showed me a video from a couple years ago. I was at the doctor and she and Lissa were with me. They were both on their phones while we waited for Michelle, my friend and primary care to come into the room. In the video I started chuckling and said…….Don’t make me laugh Barb. Ok, yes I was talking to myself. These are two people I am most willing to share what probably should not be shared so either it was that bad or I recognized they were engaged elsewhere. I ended up having a herniated disc and was in so much pain. It just shows even agony doesn’t stop the weirdness in my head. 

Natalie says that my randomness is an attribute that she loves about me. Here I am a seventy year old, great-grandmother and I still can’t control my mind. Perhaps it is time to quit trying and just embrace who I am and hope that as I age my filter of when and with whom to share doesn’t slip. I would hate to spend my eighties in prison for offending the wrong person. 

So can I just ask if I am the only one? Do you think about asking strangers for a bite of their food or if you can get a picture with them? Does it cross your mind to give candy or cards to people you encounter but do not know? No, I am not that weird….I don’t give candy to children from my car. Even I have my guardrails. I send puns to my grandkids and scratch my head when one is a bit over the top for a teen from their Noni. The last one I sent was within the acceptable range. Sure, Alexander Graham Bell was great, but I’m more impressed with his brother Taco. Innocent, not off color and it passed the sniff test. Chalk up one for Noni. 

So I will continue being me and listen to Ronnie B when he says Filters, Noni, Fiters. Because each of us and especially me needs that person who cares enough to be the filter that doesn’t quite work as well as it should. Thank you Ron but you don’t need to shush me from my peeps that may roll their eyes but love me in spite of my wandering mind and words that escape. Love you all and thank you for your generous acceptance. 

In Him,

Joyful

4-20-26