Our Job is to Give Ourselves Grace Day by Day

 This is my job. Actually, it is all of our jobs as we age. To recognize that our energy level has changed and we must budget not only our money and time but our energy. The trick is to manage our output while not limiting what we can do to increase our stamina. Exercise and eating right along with getting enough sleep is going to go along way to increase our ability to do all we want to accomplish. What a balance it is to rest enough and allow ourselves to have off days while maintaining that healthy lifestyle that boosts our energy. 

Ronnie B is so good about going for multiple walks a day. He loves heading out with our Cora dog to move. I need to join him more even when I have to turn back part way in since these two go for strenuous walks that are beyond my capabilities. Will that improve? Yes. But I also have to give myself grace for the times when long covid deprives me of my get up and go. Thankfully, these bouts are not a new normal but periods of rest that are necessary to get back to my more normal lifestyle. 

The truth is everything in life s learning to find that right balance. Whether it is parenting, job related or our health finding what works is difficult. Then when we get it figured out to a degree something shifts and wee must start detective work all over again. I have a bad tendency to shame myself thinking that I am just being lazy and making up the exhaustion that I feel with long covid. It does not help me to blame myself for what I am not able to do. I want to be able to support others like I did before this season of life. What I need to be is grateful that there are times I can step up and offer my help to those I love. 

The past six weeks or so have been a period of exhaustion and then last week a switch seemed to flip and I was more energetic. I am being cautious to not put the pedal to the metal and overdue. But I am thankful that this last bout seems to be behind me. Jenn had a good way to look at it. Rather than worrying about what is to come just live today with the energy I have and let tomorrow be what it will be. So I am now thinking that I will be able to go on our trip to Egypt and Kenya with my Ronnie B in October. Will I do all that he does? No. But I will enjoy what I can and be willing to sit at a cafe and people watch when an activity is beyond me. This trip is a test of managing energy levels since it is not one busy day but a string of days full of activity. 

I hope you are kind to yourself while being healthy as life moves along with challenges along the way. Yesterday, my twenty-two year old grandgirl was under the weather. With two littles she couldn’t just curl up and sleep. But I hope she allowed herself to forego bath time and other tasks. Kids won’t melt if they eat leftover pizza or don’t get their hair washed nightly. Even young ones need to allow for days where less is the right answer. Here is to you giving yourself what you need day by day.

In Him,

Joyful

8-24-26

Partying 9-2-5 What a Way to Celebrate the Dolly that Belonged to Each of Us

This Friday is September 25th……9-25 one of Dolly’s most famous songs and movies. So to celebrate this incredibly giving person Jenn and I are throwing a Dolly party. It will be filled with friends and laughter, more than a little bit of bling, big boobs and southern food. It excites me that my home will be filled with pink over the top joy and fun. We will have door prizes and contests. Needless to say we went tbrifting to get the perfect pink outfits, larger than life blond wigs and more. 

I can’t wait to celebrate the life of this celebrity that stayed true to her faith and beliefs. She had so many charities and stayed out of politics. Her goal was to give as much as she could to all. The books that she sent out filled homes that may not have had any otherwise. My daughter was gifted with a summer working at Dollywood in Tennessee while living and learning with other Christian college students. She even got to shake Dolly’s hand and meet her at one outing. What a treasure this lady was to each of us. 

She not only gifted us with her incredible music but her example of how to live life for others while lighting up a room with your own joy. I am excited to make some of her favorite recipes for our gathering and see how my friends choose to show up to fill my home with joy just as Dolly would have done. 

Lissa and I have our Dolly hair and are ready for the foolery to begin! Hey, we look pretty incredible as blonds. Oh wait, Lis is a blond. I think it is more our smiles than the big hair that makes us beautiful. Hope to see you Friday if you are in the neighborhood.

In Him,

Joyful

9-22-26

 

Firefighter, Zach and His Wife Impacted Our Day with Their Act of Kindness

My cup filled with steaming hot, black coffee this morning says just this……..We rise by lifting others. I love this reminder. It is not about tooting our own horn but celebrating the wins of those in our lives. I love that there are people that I can lift up whether a family member, close friend, or a complete stranger in line at the grocery store. Isn’t it true that when someone else points out something specials about us that it makes our day? What a gift we have in our words and gestures to turn a down day into a positive one with a simple statement. 

Yesterday, a firefighter named Zach and his wife made my great grandson’s day at the store. He had been carrying around a firetruck toy that he knew we were not going to purchase. Sometimes just getting to hold a toy is enough to satisfy the desire for it. When we were in line Zach and his wife noticed Caleb and the toy. She said oh that is it. He has to buy it for Caleb. They did just that with fist bumps a promise to visit his fire station and share the book about Caleb’s grandpa. It just so happens that Zach knew of Ryan’s suicide and was glad that I was going to bring a book by his station. I will add to it the picture Elissa took of her son with his toy and the biggest smile. The kindness of this couple impacted to only Caleb and his Noni but the sales clerk and customers that witnessed our interaction. It matters to me when people knew my son, Elissa’s dad and Caleb’s grandpa. It matters that I get to share my book, my testimony of how Jesus walked beside me through the loss of my son. Oh how I wish that Ryan could be here to celebrate Caleb’s fourth birthday next week. But those who surround this little boy with love will remind him of his grandpa who he reminds us of so much. 

Opportunities exist even in a checkout line to life others. Zach and his beautiful wife had no idea the loss our family went through when they decided to buy a toy with a firefighter like Zach himself. But the connection it made came from the interaction. Who knows who God is placing in your life that needs a lift that you can give. Whether it is complimenting someone on the color of their shirt or noticing the smile that says how excited they are about something. There are opportunities that we need to grab rather than ignore. Nobody is offended when you open your mouth and say something kind. Let’s all be more like Zach and his wife. 

By the way, I can’t wait to take Caleb and my book to the fire station by the golf course and pay Zach back for his gesture that meant so much to this Noni’s heart. 

In Him,

Joyful

9-20-26

Stained Glass, Sea Glass, Tapestries that Let’s Our Life Shine Through

 

Just like a stained glass window can shine light through the tapestry of life, a piece of sea glass can weather the surf and come out as a treasure for someone to find. I love the imager of both of these. Jon Guerra wrote a song on stained glass. We are all stained it’s true but when the light shines through we all look like stained glass windows. 

None of us come through life without stains and rough edges. But when we add light and let those sharp sides get softened  even the hardest moments become part of our story. This past week has been filled with thunderstorms that came with downpours or rain and wind that could carry us away. It was so uplifting yesterday when the sun came out and I could get in my Fancypants convertible and let the sun warm my face. I am thankful for the seasons when I get to long for sweater weather after a sunny summer. When I think I can’t take another snowy day the new plants pop up in the garden. 

I remember back to a time that Ron and I were facing infertility and then adoption became our hope. Then our first little boy was returned to his birthmom’s arms. It was heartbreaking and celebratory at the same time. Adoption only works if every heart is at peace with it. Here we are decades later with just the right family. Our four chosen children have families of their own and even grandkiddos for our Ryan. We have older grands that are making their way through college toward their chosen careers and wee ones that are navigating first grade and preschool. It is just as it was meant to be and Ron and I just had to prayrfully believe that God had the right family for us. The beauty of adoption is that our family extends to the birth families that are such an important part of our lives and our story. I love that we have lifelong connections and then those who have just recently found their way into this family that was always theirs through dna. Recently, Cam’s Mom, Tammy, and his sister joined the family. Natalie’s sister on her birth father’s side came into our lives. She calls me Noni-ish since their is not really a word for our relationship. I love this growing family that Ron and I believed for and that is now the biggest part of our heart. 

Our story goes on like the tumbling of seaslass it gets smoother and more beautiful through the breakers. Nobody promises life will be easy but the fact that we don’t walk the shore alone is what makes even the stormy days beautiful. One can think of life as stained glass, sea glass, or a tapestry that is quilts scraps of leftover material into a warm, lovely gift. Jesus and those he places in our lives never leave us alone but are always present for an encouraging word and a much needed embrace. Oh did I leave out the laughter? Yes, the fun, foolery and laughter are also a light whether it is with little kiddos or old age mishaps. 

In Him,

Joyful

9-19-26

Psalm 139:23-34 A Daily Prayer on my Phone Just for Me

 I am putting this as the wallpaper on my phone. It is a prayer that I want to be reminded to pray everyday. This one is for me. Too often I hear God through the filter of how it can benefit others never really internalizing the verse for myself. This needs to penetrate my heart and returning to it day after day will help it do just that. I need God to reveal to me what is stealing my peace that keeps me from Him. What is it that I continue to hold tightly in my grip and why don’t I simply let it go and trust God with it? 

It cannot possibly be that I think I have more love or understanding of the circumstance that I am not releasing. Also, my head knows that God loves those I love even more than I could ever love them. He is also much more powerful and all knowing on how to resolve any given situation. But here I sit still clinging to my mom can fix it wand believing if I say the right thing or do the next step to solve a problem that it will somehow fix it. Clearly my efforts have not succeeded in the past. What makes me think my new efforts will prove more effective than what God can do? Too often I let it go just to snatch it back from His capable hands. It is exhausting!

This morning I was listening to a wise 98 year old pastor who shared this verse. I know I have read this verse often over the years. But his prompting to repeat it and let it hit my heart every day made me have hope. Hope that I can let God search my heart for what I need to lay down and what that letting go of can do for my relationship with Him. I want to rest in His peace, to dwell in His grace and trust in His love and kindness. It needs to hit my heart again and again that He has not only my life but the lives of my children and grandchildren in His most capable hands. This I believe but also hope to put firmly in my heart so I can rest. 

I highly recommend The Old Pastor’s Table as a YouTube channel that is filled with wisdom for a seventy year old like me but also for younger ones among you. This one I watched this morning and it had not only practical wisdom but verses that pointed to God’s will for my life. 

https://youtu.be/QCEuJgWPJa8?is=Bc1tJP0cX-7EzEn- 

Let me end with a reminder to myself. Jesus loves me this I know for the Bible tells me so. He loves me and knows my worries, my wants, and my heart for others. I don’t ever need to carry these on my own but trust Him with not only my salvation but my entire heart. He has this. I can let go of the rope and let Him have it from now on. 

In Him,

Joyful

9-18-26

Adult Everyday Doesn’t Mean No Time for Rest

 Gone are the play dates where we just have to hop in our car seat and be driven to a friend’s for hours of play. Yet, it is simple for us to make a call and show up to go for a walk or a cup of coffee and catch up with a friend. 

Gone are the recesses where running for a swing hand in hand with a best classmate makes getting an empty one side by side so special. But we can tag along for a doctor’s appointment and chat on the way. Then we can be there as a second pair of ears and support whatever the physical uncovers. 

Gone are the sleepovers cuddled up with friends on our backyard trampoline believing that the shooting stars that light up the sky are just for us. Who knew that people all over the world are also marveling at them in early August. But the sharing of pictures of family and the encouragement of complimenting a fresh haircut can be just as magical. 

I am not envying my childhood years and that includes smooth, wrinkle free skin and an abundance of energy. Adulting has seasons. Some are hectic with tasks to complete while our homes are full of wee ones. Others fade into quiet mornings and time to read the book we pick up. Yes, in every season we have to live each day. How I wish I would have recognized sooner that adulting doesn’t mean never taking a much deserved break. Tasks must get completed but too often we put a lot of those on our plates that don’t need to be there. Busy is good. But rest is also important. They say you can’t see the forest for the trees. How often we miss connections because of getting everything accomplished for everyone. 

Slow down. Not give up. But don’t wait till you are seventy to spend quiet time. Embrace moments even in the chaos of jobs, family and sports schedules. You need to practice now so you will be an accomplished rested when the time comes. 

In Him,

Joyful

9-15-25

Our Millie Girl is Five!

 Happy, happy, happy fifth birthday to our rambunctious Millie. She is such a delight always exploring and trying new adventures. One of her favorite things is to spend time in Noni and Papa’s rv. Whether watching a movie, having a snack or just pretending to drive us on a road trip this girl can spend hours in our little casita on wheels. 

I love getting to spend time with this grandgirl who has so much enthusiasm for life and is always up to try anything. Having adult size siblings has encouraged her to jump in and do whatever they are doing. Everyone should be blessed with five grownups who adore you and encourage you to succeed.

So happy birthday Millie. Noni and Papa love you and are excited to see how you celebrate your big day.

In Him,

                                                    Joyful

                                                    9-14-26