You Can Spit Or Cuss

"You can cuss or spit, but you cannot do both."

When my kids were little I wanted them to behave and be polite when they were at other people's houses. Heck, I wanted them to be polite and behave when they were at my house. Anyway, whenever they got out of the car to go into someone's house they got the same lecture from me, their Mother. I am pretty sure it is the same lecture every kid gets from every mom everywhere.

Don't do this, don't do that. Do this, do that. yada yada yada yada. How much do kids listen to these mini or not so mini lectures? Not at all. They just sit there nodding their sweet little heads until we finish, shut up, and let them get out of the car. I had seen their glazed stares as I rambled on and on hoping that my words would mold their behaviors.

Once, when Tanner was about 10 and on his way to Michael Js. birthday party. I started my normal lecture then glanced over at him. I stopped. Ok it was obvious a new approach was required here. Being the random, weird mom that I was I came up with an idea.

"Tanner, do you want to cuss or spit at this party?"
"What?"
"Do you want to cuss or spit? You have to decide right now. Because once you decide you have to stick with it. You can cuss or spit but you can't do both."
"What?"
"At this party, you can cuss all night or you can spit all night. But you can't do both."
"Mom, I am not going to cuss or spit at Michael Js party."
"Ok, then go have fun."

He hopped out of the car and ran up to his friend's house. Halfway up to the door he stopped, turned around, and just shook his head. I am sure he was convinced that his mother had definitely lost her mind!

So we both avoided the boring, useless lecture that all 4 of my kids and all kids endure. From then on, everytime I dropped the kids off the conversation was the same. "Are you going to cuss or spit?" They would laugh and choose and promise not to do both. This was a gift that turned my boring lecture into a funny inside joke with my kids.

Just an insight, they behaved the same at people's houses even if I didn't remind them to. And you know, I don't think they ever SPIT or CUSSED in their friend's houses. Well, at least not in front of their parents!

In Him,
Joyful
3-3-2010