Sunday, June 16, 2013

Heavenly Father's Day Card

Ryan, we have Lissa here for Father's Day. We will share videos and pictures and stories of you. Wish you were here to get her great big hugs. She is making a card for her Papas and Hector. You would have loved seeing the energetic, inquisitive almost 9 year old that she is today. We will keep your love for her alive here until you meet again decades from now. Wish you could know how your love and encouragement has impacted all our lives, my son. I am so grateful that a huge piece of you lives on in Lissa's big brown eyea and incredible (sometimes ornery) smile. 

You left too soon but you left behind an unimaginable bond between all of us who love you. Ry, since your sudden trip home so many other families have lost their sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, grandkids, cousins to suicide. Right now I know of 3 families holding their breath and praying their young adult children can get through the darkness without making that irreversible decision. Some say my pain is greatest because I am your mom. Reality is suicide impacts everyone you loved and that loved you equally. The joy you left behind is greater than the ache of losing you but I still wish we could have a 'do over' and be together today and into the future. God knows, I haven't worried about you a day since you left. You are wrapped in His presence but I am jealous and wanted you in my presence and my arms much longer than the 24 years you were here. 
Until we meet again, we will do what you did and encourage others and reach out to those who have the overwhelming loss that changes life and keep our love for you always in Lissa's life.
Hearts to you and Happy Father's Day, Mom


  1. Barb what wonderful person you are. Your writing is Amazing

  2. To know Him ... and make Him known. Our heart's cry as we served as a family on the mission field.

    I would love to see you splashin' our little group of moms. We could use your words of encouragement. your tips. your photos. your anything gloriously mom.

    I jot some few notes on Mondays. But it's a link up whenever you can kind of thing. I understand the filled to the brim momma schedules. We would be honored to have you join. Just moms. Sharing our notes. Creating a melody.

    Splashin' Momma,

    It was so wonderful to hear from you and then to read this beautiful post...It is true,we are jealous that we are not the ones wrapped in the arms of Jesus. I just miss my daughter and it is a family situation that hurt me dearly. I have given it to God only to take it back because "I" thought I could fix it...can you just seems to get worse.
    I will remember you in prayer.
    Warm Regards