Who Am I?

 These are the I am statements I need to focus on rather than all the negatives that can get stuck in my head. I am God’s child. As we all know there is nothing our child can do to make us give up on them. How much more does God stand beside me and embrace me even when I fall. I am in a community of believers. There are broken people in God’s church so trust me there is drama and missteps, judgement and harshness. But it is because church is more of a hospital for the ones who need healing and that is why we gather. Being a new creation in Christ is the best. It is not a one time new beginning but a daily, moment to moment renewing. He not only forgives but forgets my mistakes and poor choices. In Him, I strive to do better but He knows I am human even in my faith. Justified and righteous can make me feel superior until I remember it is not by anything I have done or could do. It is a free gift that God gives because His son was willing to pay my debts and bring me into the family. When life gets scary and I am unsure on outcomes, I am so thankful that I am secure in His hands. His embrace and hand holding lets me know that especially when life is tough I am not alone. He doesn’t cause my circumstances but He stays close and walks me through it. The saying not what if but even if is one I cling to. Bad things happen and even if and when they do God uses them for good. That is why sometimes reluctantly I try to be thankful in all things. So many opportunities to be there for other families opened up because of our son’s suicide. I am thankful for being able to help others but not for our loss. This last one is only possible if I admit that He really does not have a tally sheet in heaven. I am free of condemnation by God but I have to work especially hard to not continue to condemn myself. Just let it go sounds simple enough but it is the hardest thing. 

Who I am in Christ is who you are in Christ. This is about a relationship not a ritualistic religion. One can work to follow all the rules and still not be in Him. All relationships need to be nurtured with time spent together. That is why I have my alarm set at 5:30 am. Now for you it may be 10pm that works best. But the point is that to be in Him you have to set aside time for Him. It could be in the car after you drop off the carpool and your minivan is suddenly quiet. It could be at a coffee shop over that chocolate croissant you enjoy.It could be a quick whisper or thought of Him while you are doing another task. Whenever you lean in He will be there ready to embrace the time together. Life is difficult but so much easier when He steps in and goes through it with me. 

In Him,

Joyful

3-30-24