We hear this line to have and to hold in wedding ceremonies but perhaps it should apply to other areas of life as well. Today we seem to be a society of toss it out and replace rather than fix and repair. This simple saying describes my Ronnie B. He would rather repair and hold onto what we have than recycle and get a new anything.
To have is what we already own or have in our world. I never thought about this line in our vows but the promise is to hold not release or discard. I love that. As many of you know Ronnie B and I were separated for several years. Even in that difficult time in our relationship we continued to bring the family together every evening for dinner. Not knowing how our story would evolve was hard to hold onto hope of a future together. But we never gave up and a little kidney stone brought us back under one roof. I was in agony and went to stay with him for nurturing and nursing. I never left. We began praying together bringing the hard conversations together with Christ in the center. Life has never been better since we still have one another and hold on to our relationship that is half a century in the making.
Some would say the brokenness was too much to repair but I am forever grateful for that season that showed us just what we have but also what we should hold onto and not throw away. Would it have been easier to just part ways? Absolutely. It took real commitment and getting past hurts to come back together. But I am convinced that our lives would not be the great love story that it is without walking through those hard years. I am forever grateful to my Young Life girls and there three word prayer for us……under one roof. When we got back into one home those girls believed as do I that their prayers were answered. Susi even stitched it on the quilt she made and repaired for us.
I hope to embrace the to have and to hold in my life. The desire to get something shiny and new only to discard what I already have is tempting. But what a gift to have an old sweater or that comfy couch that used to be my mom’s. Yesterday, I found out that the insurance company didn’t total my car from when I hit a deer this week. My Murano was my dream car but I had been researching other vehicles just in case. I didn’t find anything I would love as much. So I was thrilled when they said they would repair my Deville, yes that is her name. I have her and now I get to hold onto her a bit longer. Last night, the power went out and this morning our microwave wouldn’t worked. I was bummed I couldn’t reheat my coffee. I love this microwave and worried it was toast. But Ron unplugged it for a bit and it works just fine. I get to hold onto it for hopefully many years to come.
To have and to hold not to toss and replace is the way to live life. It never really hit me that this little phrase in a commitment ceremony was to cling to what we have. I love that. I love my Ronnie B and the life we share because this part of our story kept us from moving forward without one another. Our amazing love story is not all romance and roses but that is what makes it so precious. I plan on holding onto my man for as long as God keeps us both this side of heaven and then reunites us there.
In Him,
Joyful
5-9-26
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