Reluctant Socialite

 I have become a reluctant socialite. My trauma induced autism after I lost my son to suicide almost a decade ago completely shut down my ‘get out and visit’ self. It has been easier to tuck my head into solitary activities that don’t connect me to others. This sad truth challenges me to be intentional about spending time with those I love, those I like and those I long to encourage.

This year I decided to do a few things intentionally for bringing others back into my life.
1. Write everyday. I know that sounds like an activity isolated from others. But the reality of sharing my heart online each day brings others into my world even if it is only them pressing the like button on Facebook. It gives me pleasure to see others viewing my thoughts on a daily basis.
2. Begin a Tuesday night group for ladies in their twenties that I have had the pleasure of watching grow into beautiful women. The life connection we share is that each of us has lost someone to suicide or a drug related circumstance. Getting them together to connect and share life has been so good at getting me connected. What fun we have just chatting and eating for hours.
3. Spend time with friends and family on a weekly basis. After we lost Ryan, Ron set up a list of friends to have Saturday morning breakfast with to connect. This helped me so much since it was a routine of sitting down with a different set of friends every week. I am trying to reach out to others to have coffee out or invite them over to our home. I have not been as successful in this endeavor. Too often I get caught up in my own heartaches and choose to wallow rather than embrace.

My hope is to continue connecting with those I love rather than avoid social situations. A truth I know is that when someone you care about is not returning your calls or seems to not be there for you, often it is their emotional isolation not their heart for you. Don’t give up. Reach out and blast your way into their lives. I am more than grateful for those who overrule my avoiding behaviors and connect with me. It matters. I love it even when I seem reluctant or stubborn. This personality shift is not what I want or what I signed up for but it is my reality. The good news is I am working on it.

In Him,
Joyful
3-20-19