Embracing One More Family Who Are Heartcrushed By Loss

Yesterday we got some news that another family got the heart crushing news that their son took his life. How it brings me right back to the day we lost our Ryan at his own hand. None of us will ever be able to truly understand the decision to end it all. But it is possible to understand the heartache of those who are left behind. Too many families in our small town can relate to just how devastating the loss of an adult or teen child is from their own personal loss. What I wish is that I could be there for this family to hug them, comfort them and let them know that they are not alone in their grief. Instead I drove past their home and prayed that they could somehow cling to their faith and know that they are loved. This is family that I am grateful to know having had both their kiddos in my classroom for years.

Families should know that all of us who you share your kids with are so blessed to spend a bit of time on their path to adulthood. Especially special ed teachers who get to walk beside kids for years and elementary teachers who get to make a classroom family of sorts for an entire year. Your loss and pain is real to us as well. We enjoyed your heart for your students at our parent/teacher conference and while you supported our efforts throughout the year. This loss in our community brings me right back to the loss of my own son. I remember his favorite teacher who put up with him for several years in her special ed program called me after his goodbye party/funeral and apologized for not being there. She told me that she intended to come. In fact, she was in her car driving up the hill to the church when she was overcome and had to turn around and go home. Her fear was that I would think she was selfish that she didn’t come for us. The reality is I am blessed by her heart for my son that was a little pain in her classroom over a decade before he took his life.


The impact of losing a child even when they are grown is hardest on the family. But the loss ripples out into communities and touches so many lives. Those of us who have lived this loss are so sad for one more family joining our group that we would never choose to form. There is no way to really love on people on a day like today. What I am comforted by is that this family has a great faith and they will cling to that and each other in the hours, days, weeks, and months to come. For now I will pray and know that even in our Covid isolation we can let them know we love them and grieve with them.

In Him,
Joyful
3-20-20