Pity Party to Celebration

 So I decided yesterday that attitude is key to getting through a seemingly hard day. Yes, it was Ryan’s birthday and I couldn’t call him and sing to him or bake him his favorite cake but I could celebrate my son in other ways with others who love him as much as I do. My thoughtful niece Briana called and told me she would pick up balloons and come by to launch them with me. So after she got off work, Natalie, Nate, Bri, baby Felix Ryan and I went up on the roof in a powerful wind believing those balloons would fly sky high. Well as I videoed the release, Bri let the balloon go weighted clip and all. That balloon sunk over the side of this six story building into the alley below. Nate pointed out through our laughter that Ry would have appreciated this nontraditional, unexpected launch. This was the first birthday that Ron and I were not together since Ryan died so I was having a bit of a pity party earlier in the day but what a joy to be with others in laughter who love my son.

Later in the evening Lissa and I read my blog book about my loss of my son. I wouldn’t be courageous enough to read it on my own so we are reading it together on FaceTime. We are only getting through a few posts at a time because we take the time to cry and tell additional stories about her daddy. In the background I got to talk to her mama and little sister. Oh how I am blessed to have Ryan’s family in my life.

The day started out with me feeling sorry for myself and ended with me having the courage to admit the blessings Ryan continues to gift me with in my life. What a beautiful day it was and what a lucky lady I am to be Mom, Noni and wife to this family God gave me.

In Him,
Joyful
3-3-20