Transitioning is hard for me as it is for most of you. Transitioning from infants in my home to school age children was a transition that allows other influences on my kids. Even as my kids progressed through their school years and participated in sports my influence was not the only or even most impactful on their lives. Sure I could still make them do their chores, share my beliefs and set an example by my actions, but others were shaping them as well. When they were through school and went off to college or got married our time together was even more limited. My role went from protector, teacher and comforter to a safe place to vent, a cheerleader for successes and a prayer warrior for each of them. The influence I had was in the past and a bit in how I live my life now. What was hard for me in these last transitions has been to not be bossy and give unasked for advice. I fail miserably at this most days. What I wish I did was believe my own words that God loves them more than I ever could and He is there to guide their steps as well as mine. But no I can’t seem to muster up the self-control to shut up and turn my hands up with my kids. Heck, even my grandkids are close to being adults and here I will have to go through another transition with them.
Life can be exhausting for those of us who have all the answers and no where to spread them. But like butter on a slice of toast that is warm and wonderful fresh out of the toaster. It is not so desired at the end of the night after it has sat on the counter all day. The truth is it may not even be fit to eat at this point. So here I sit with my advice bottled up or so it should be. Knowing that my advice is not desired unless it is asked for. In my head my advice is just what they need to hear and better yet follow to the letter. But unless it is asked for it should remain in my head as I look for successes they are making in spite of living life on their own. Guess it is time for me to get a new dog so I don’t transfer my Bossy Barbie to Ron. You know it will be impossible for me to plug my ideas up and my cat, Mitzi, is sure never going to listen to me.
Think I am going to get practical and buy this book for more success.
I get what you are saying. One thing raising children taught me, and now with friends, is that no one follows my brilliant advice. Ha ha. Even when asked for, well, maybe once in a while they follow it. But mainly people follow their own paths.
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