Joy is Our Face of Faith

  Joy is our face of faith

Joy is contagious and spills onto those around us. It chips away at the fears and pain that holds us hostage. Joy doesn't mean our circumstances aren't harder than we could imagine. It does mean that there is a bigger picture and a coming out on the other side. Have you ever been driving through a tunnel and up ahead you see the light as you are surrounded by darkness? As you drive forward the light grows bigger and bigger until you become a part of the light and leave the darkness behind.

When Cameron was a youngster, we went through a tunnel in Yosemite that we had driven through many times before. This time we saw the light through Cameron's young eyes. He told us to look that we were going to be a part of the picture. I have held his innocent words close to my heart all these years. We are never so lost in the dark that we can't become a part of the light once again. My young son could see that we were not staying in our circumstance but moving forward to the promise just ahead of us. I love that. I never drive through a tunnel unaware anymore.

There is a peace that keeps us from wringing our hands and believing the worst even when life is beyond our understanding and hope feels so far away. That light of faith keeps us peaceful even in the hardest days. My sweet grandgirl lost her stepdad when he lost the hope of tomorrow and stepped in front of a train. These past couple weeks have shook our family to the core. When she was five our son ended his life with a shotgun. Both their deaths could leave us encircled by the darkness of loss. The images of their deaths are not where we should focus but on the smiles that were in their eyes. Even now there is laughter through the tears as we recall memories of times together and hold one another close. The vision I have is of my Ryan elbowing others out of the way in heaven to embrace Hector and thank him for being a terrific dad to Elissa. I believe Ry is promising to that Ami and Elissa will be okay because they are loved by so many. It won't be easy but there is light even after their unimaginable deaths.

Today is Christmas and Ron is upstairs and I am downstairs being his personal delivery service. Ron has Covid and I am alone on the couch as he sleeps alone in our bed. What occurs to me is the peace I have about this situation even though a year ago I lost my favorite and only sister to this dreaded virus. The difference is that Ron is protected by vaccines and treatments that weren't available to Teri. Rather than being grumpy for our very different Christmas, I am grateful for the peace I have that this won't take the love of my life and have me mourning another loss. The light at the end of this tunnel is that we will be embracing one another soon and sharing life with family and friends. A very different Christmas can leave us in a funk or remembering all the family filled ones of the past as well as the ones yet to come. 

Joy is the face of faith. Fear is the face of hopelessness. My greatest joy is the peace I have in knowing I never walk through any tunnel alone. Jesus is always with me in my conversations with Him and in those he has placed in my life to hold my hand. My heart is full even alone on the couch this Christmas morning. There is not the promised snow on the ground but even that will come when it comes.

Today I will deliver warm cinnamon rolls halfway up the stairs and enjoy the enchiladas a friend dropped in our carport. Last night our daughter's homemade potato soup and fresh baked rolls were just what we needed as comfort food. God is good all the time, all the time God is good.

Merry Christmas from our hearts to yours.

In Him,

Joyful

12-25-21