2 Losses That Both Matter

2 students lost a parent this week from our elementary school. One lost his dad to a valiant battle with cancer and the other lost his mom last night. Tomorrow is the service for the dad who was loved in the community, his wife and 4 kids will be surrounded by family and friends.

The email we got about the student who lost his mom gave no details about her death. The detail that was harshly included was that she was not an active part of her child's life. In fact, it stated that this child only saw his mom once a year, so had little contact. This fact was added for some reason. Why?

It was a reflective day for me realizing that someone at Lissa's school could have minimized her painful loss  when her dad, my son, Ryan took his life. At the time, he lived 2 states away, only saw her a couple times the last year of his life. His addictions made him realize that he needed to get healthy before he could be the Daddy she deserved. Yet knowing my son and knowing my granddaughter and their love for each other, I can assure you his death, her loss was enormous. She sits and watches videos of their precious times together over and over, in the same rocker that he read her stories in almost a year ago.

I don't know the purpose of the explanation in the email, I am sure it was not malicious.  What I do know is there is a 3rd grader missing his mom just as much or more than he would have if he had been with her everyday. The love we feel is not dependent on daily involvement or even right choices. Love matters in spite of distance or mistakes.

My prayer is that every child who loses a parent or a loved one is nurtured and comforted no matter the circumstances. Whether a medical illness takes a life or mental and emotional anguish the loss is still unbearable. Prayers for these family this week are appreciated. No one should lose a child but no child should lose a parent either.

In Him,
Joyful
1-6-2011