Perception is the Function of Contrast

 Perception is the function of contrast

This is something I have said for decades. In the classroom, in conversation and continuously to myself. How we compare our circumstances to those of others can make us grateful or can defeat us. When I look at my life and what I don't have or how I misstep, I can be defeated and feel like a failure. Or worse I can throw myself a pity party and just quit trying. But if I compare myself to those who have less or whose situations are a struggle, I can feel blessed and see how fortunate I am.

Our culture today seems like it is filled with measuring up to expectations that often are not even realistic. Goal setting is always a good thing but we need to remember to give ourselves grace when those goals are not met on our timeline. So goal in sign language is one arm outstretched with your pointer finger raised. The other hand is by your ear with the same finger raised. You then bring your hand nearest to you toward your outstretched hand. Got it? The reason I bring this up is that when you are moving toward a goal you are succeeding. There is improvement even when the two hands have not met representing that the goal is not met. You may not have achieved your goal but you are not where you were when you started. Give yourself credit for how you have changed. This is contrasting where you are to where you have been. Celebrate.

My goal almost twelve years ago was to blog/write everyday. Let me tell you that if I look at the number of blogs in twelve years my number falls short by so much. If I measure success by that I should have written 4,380 times. The truth is I have written a mere 1,678. So have I failed? Yes, if my yardstick is the number of posts I got less than a 50%. The success of my writing is when consider what this blog has meant to me. It has been therapy, an outlet, has brought me closer to those who read my heart, and has shared my faith walk with others. One of the greatest gifts is that I can go back and read in real time how God stayed near me when I was so broken. I am grateful for the window to my heart even if I was the only one who ever read and reread my words. The fact that my journey/faith walk through losing my son to suicide is now a book to share with others is beyond what I could have imagined when I began writing. My writing is a success. It has meant so much to me. Sure there have been seasons that I didn't write for extended periods of time. But there have also been times when I was writing twice a day because of the comfort writing provides. 

Comparing and contrasting our lives and circumstances to others is not a healthy way to live. It makes us arrogant or defeated. Neither one of these is the way I want to live. Even comparing ourselves to our former selves can be a trap for anxiety. At 65 years old, I cannot open jars I once could however I can keep to a routine of coffee and Bible time in the morning. Life changes. Some changes are easy to embrace others are difficult to swallow.

The old saying~ My dog's bigger than your dog~ shows the silliness of comparing. There is nothing to brag about that you chose a bigger dog than I did. The truth is your poop duty is way worse than mine. But okay I admit that your great dane is bigger than my maltese does that make you feel better than me? See how silly comparisons can be.

So I will try to write again tomorrow but if I don't I will be thankful that I wrote today. 

In Him,

Joyful

12-2-21