I Love You More Than Dirt and that is Saying Something

 "I love you more than dirt." That doesn't seem like a particularly encouraging statement. But that is something that I have said to my kids and grandkids their whole lives. I went on to explain how important dirt is to giving us life through the plants that grow and thrive because of the nutrients the dirt/soil contains. This simple phrase has become a private, goofy way of telling them that I love them more than life itself. 

"Nobody likes you." Again this doesn't sound encouraging in fact it seems downright hurtful. Their response to this is "Nobody liked you first." Outsiders would probably recoil at the way I spoke to a child that I should encourage and adore. But for us it was just that inside joke that connected us. 

I remember when Cameron was a toddler and we lived in northern California. My Dad would call from Arizona and ask Cam, "What did the bear get out of the tree?" Cameron would proudly say "Honey." This simple question and answer connected them with its familiarity. 

Over the years I have come up with inside banter with students, kiddos, people that matter. The connections that others can't understand are the glue that keeps us tethered to one another. Video chats have made it easier to stay connected over distance but even then familiarity is key to building the bonds that bind us. 

Be careful when you hear a parent say something that seems harsh with a little. It may be that they are just having fun interacting in their own way. I remember when Natalie was little and had casts on her leg every three months to stretch her calf muscle that we would not always treat her as an injured child. She weaponized that cast toward her brothers and sweet Timmy Haines. Once at the mall when Natalie was running ahead of us, Ron turned and shouted, "Get back here before I break your other leg." Boy did that bring a swift response from other mall walkers. We knew she did not break her leg and he was just goofing with her but people nearby rightfully were concerned. 

Now I am of the age with my white hair and wrinkles that give me some free license. Often if I say something off color young people will assume I am old and don't know what I'm saying. My Gramma Peabody loved this stage of life. She felt she had free license to be ornery and get away with it. Once we were in the car with Todd and Troy, my preteen nephews. Gramma started sticking her hand out the window flipping people off. The boys were appalled and whispered to their Mom that Gramma was inappropriate. Gramma turned to them and quite innocently said that she saw other people waving to each other in this way. Wasn't that the new sign for hello? The twinkle in her eye told us that she knew that her great-grandsons would remember her flipping the bird more than any other conversation she could have with them. I just love the image I get of Mrs. Emma Peabody waving her middle finger out the window to shock all of us as well as the passers by. 

After all, isn't it really all about connections and memories that make us smile? You bet it is. 

In Him,

Joyful

1-13-22